


What are the odds?

by squeakylids



Category: Supernatural
Genre: A lot - Freeform, Alpha - Freeform, Alpha Dean, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Apocalypse, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Blow Jobs, Breeding, Claiming, Croatoan Virus, Dean Loves Pie, Dean Needs A Hug, Dean is a Sweetheart, Demons, F/M, First Time Blow Jobs, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I have No Excuse, Lies of Omission, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Alternating, POV First Person, POV Multiple, Pie, Shower Sex, Slow Burn, Smut, To Be Edited, Violence, beta, omega - Freeform, writing is hard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-17
Updated: 2018-08-23
Packaged: 2018-11-15 09:33:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 42,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11228223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/squeakylids/pseuds/squeakylids
Summary: When Lucifer and Michael decided to duke it out on earth, Lucifer got Sam while Michael got... the finger.But what are the repercussions from a schoolyard brawl that had been called out by rival brothers, but the challenge never met? A world of chaos and demons, with very few silver linings on the perpetual storm clouds. A world where Omegas are hunted down and crucified to the point of extinction, where the devil himself enjoys Sunday strolls through the chaos in his pristine white suit; where the horsemen walk amongst the living and old powers awaken from ancient slumbers.It was in that world that Dean found something akin to a unicorn, and everything shifted, old hopes reigniting into infernos.Ugh, I suck at summaries. Whatever. I'm having fun writing the work.





	1. And he found her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the end of the world, and the world is darker than ever. It's been about five years since the apocalypse and what was left of humanity succumbed to either violence or possession. Pockets of people scrap together lives, but everyone knows that in this world, it's only a matter of time. Survival is based off the strength of your convictions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are taking the time to read this, please know that I literally wrote this instead of sleeping, so it's a bit of a whirlwind adventure of a mental tangent gone wild. 
> 
> I am constantly re-reading and editing this, so please forgive any of my grievous spelling and grammatical errors as you read, I am fixing them as I find them. Thanks in advance! I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I'm enjoying writing it.
> 
> Alternating POV's, I'd like to think it's pretty obvious who's who. 
> 
> FYI Kenzie's mother uses Portuguese terms of endearment and swears.

_"For the last time, where is the girl?" came the smokey, deep British tone in a conversational manner._

_If had I wanted to, I probably could have reached out and touched the demon standing nearest to me._

_My hands were clamped firmly over my nose and mouth to stifle my own breathing as I listened to what was happening just below me unfolding in terror. I couldn't move or turn away because I risked exposure from where I was. The area around me was covered in dead leaves and twigs, and the last thing my parents had imparted to me was their desperate will for my survival._

_"I won't ask again," he warned, like a parent warning their child away from another piece of candy._

_"Vá comer um pau."_

_My mother's voice had been full of rage and venom, and she'd followed it with a contemptuous spit. An appropriate follow-up when you tell someone to go eat a dick, and if the disgust in the British voice was anything to go by, my mother had spit in the man's face._

_It was also the last thing she ever said._

_"So be it," had come the voice, followed by a snap of fingers._

_And suddenly the air had been torn by the sound of snarling dogs and my parents screaming. The sound had been accompanied by the laughter of the dog handler as it had echoed unnaturally all around me, and it was something I would never forget._

*

As usual, I awoke with a startled gasp.

It had been almost three years since that night, and still, I always found myself waking in a cold sweat when that nightmare visited me. There was a noticeable tremble in my hand as I lifted it to cover my eyes for a moment to chase away the remnants of that memory, remembering peering through the underbrush along that small wash out's edge, seeing my parents get ripped apart.

It wasn’t even the worst thing I’d seen given armageddon, but it still made sleep an elusive bastard on my best days.

Sitting up, I yawned and rubbed my eyes, knowing I wasn’t going to get any more sleep. Judging by the weak golden glow coming through the broken windows of the farmhouse's one remaining room, dawn wasn’t too far off anyway. This place was isolated enough I could stop for a day or so to catch my breath, check my gear, and try and figure out my next move, but not secure enough to really camp out in, an apparent fire having gutted a majority of the structure and exposed the basement. The facade I had seen peeking through the trees had been just that, a disappointing facade.

Even as I sat up and reached for my backpack I knew that my next move was imperative for my continued survival. If I messed up it was going to be the last thing I ever did. Well... if I messed up any further. I was still cursing the accident that had broken the last of my suppressant injections, and the fact that I had been unable to obtain more. I had dropped my bag a few days prior when I had been sleeping up a tree; it slipped from my fingers as I had untied it from the branch where it had been safe and secure for the entire previous night. I had watched it as it seemed to hit every branch down in complete dismay, knowing the fragile syringes wouldn't survive.

Fuck being an Omega, and FUCK going into heat. I needed to find somewhere to hide, and in this world that was a lot easier said than done. Suppressants were harder and harder to find, but even when they had been easy there had been all kinds of complications with using them, some of them potentially deadly, and I had already been taking the harsh drugs without a break for far too long. I had a week, no longer, and then my life was going to suck for a bit.

It looked like the area I had been heading into was a little more developed than the rolling fields I had been wandering for so long though. If I got lucky, I might be able to find a storm cellar or something that I could really lock down, something made to keep someone safe.

*

Luck was an _asshole_.

At first, it hadn't seemed that way; I'd found a house with a completely intact and more importantly clean, although musty, storm cellar. Even better? Right outside the storm cellar was the remnants of an overgrown garden. There wasn't much left that the end of the world hadn't destroyed, but a few scraggly tomatoes were welcome, but more importantly was the rosemary. A huge, pungent, overgrown bush of rosemary, right outside the doors. The kind that could be thrashed a little before I locked up to help mask my smell, so long as I sealed the door well. Something that would help me be a little more _safe_.

Then, the day my heat started the area I had been in had suddenly been inundated with Demon sign. I had stood amongst the crushed rosemary in complete horror as a huge black vortex had suddenly come roaring to life, touching down what had to be just _miles_  from where I was. There had been a town there and I was willing to bet that a huge portion of whatever population was left there was now possessed, and if a stray Alpha wasn’t frightful enough, the idea of a Demon was that much more terrifying.

I could still vividly remember crossing near the border of Utah, which was wholly occupied by Croatoan infected and possessed. Lining the highway, for as far as I could see, had been crucified, disemboweled Omegas. From what I could tell, they had been nailed to their crosses, and then gutted and left to die there, slowly, no mercy granted.

This world was not forgiving to my kind.

So, as I felt the first pangs of my heat start I was running, literally, for my life.

My heat hit me like a loony toons character running into a frying pan. Forcing myself to move without stopping I tried to ignore the way my body screamed at the rubbing of my clothes, or the need to relieve the ache between my legs as my body craved. I couldn't tell if it was dry or raining, my body was so drenched in sweat and slick. It made it hard to move with my clothing trying to constrict me, but I couldn't stop to try and fix it, and I knew it. Stopping meant death right then. I didn’t even stop moving when the haze of the fever overtook me and I was left stumbling, crashing into the hulking shapes of abandoned cars as I desperately tried to force my body on along the freeway my feet were following. Things began to dance in my peripheries, dark shapes in the hazy twilight of my mind that I could not decide the validity of when I finally sought shelter.

My clothing chaffed irritably against my sweat soaked skin as my head swam and my body ached as I crawled into the abandoned, rotting trailer in the middle of the roadway. The thing had seen better days, the small airstream listing dangerously to one side, but it was whole. I noticed the windows cracked but otherwise intact as I struggled to close the door behind me, engaging the flimsy lock. It wasn’t much, but it was better than nothing in the open fields of Kansas, and it had probably been at least two days since I had seen the demon sign. It wasn't like I had any more options, and it would at least offer me shelter from the random thunderstorms.

Half out of my mind I was barely aware of my shaking hand pulling out a tube of lipstick and hastily scrawling a seal on the door my mother had ingrained in my brain. It was like my hand was on autopilot, dropping the remainder of the stolen red cosmetic to the moldy carpet the moment it was done. With a shaky breath, I forced myself to go for the round cardboard tube of table salt in my bag. My shaking hands dropped the container twice before I was able to get a complete circle around myself, using way more than necessary in my daze. My actions were locked in desperate urgency, but everything seemed to be moving incredibly slowly.

I lay there for an eternity that passed in a blink, gasping for breath that burned in my lungs before a heat cramp rolled through me. It was sharp enough to make me cry out as slick further drenched my jeans, and before I knew it my right hand was down my pants rubbing desperately against my clit as my left rolled my nipple roughly through my grimy, sweat-soaked tank top. That was all it took.

I came with a scream that caused nearby birds to take flight in a cacophony of noise that made my blood to run cold.

The moment of peace that came after my desperate orgasm was overshadowed by the terror of knowing that I had been so loud in the momentary clarity that followed. I knew in reality that in my state I hadn’t made it too far away from all that demon sign, not far enough to be safe, and that I was still in very real danger. I scrambled for the discarded lipstick and forced myself to move from window to window, hastily scrawling wards on the fractured glass with a shaking hand. My trembling was so violent I couldn't even fix my sagging pants as I tried to make sure the sigils were passable, before falling back to the carpet with a desperate gasp, sobbing in terror.

I didn’t have much to ward off an actual Alpha aside from the flimsy lock on the trailer door, just that and my revolver. A revolver that only had three more rounds.

There was no time to dwell on it because my biology was screaming at me, my brain blanking to a weird state of terrified need that drove out all other thoughts. My hands tore at my clothing even as the cramps started rolling through me again, slick and sweat drenching the fabric making it hard to remove in my fevered state. The struggle was causing more whimpers and moans to escape my lips, even as I desperately tried to choke them back, knowing just how unsafe I was.

*

The light changed and shifted as time passed, moments dragging on for hours and hours passing in a blink. I couldn’t tell if it had been a day or a week. My heat fever raged and my body shook, and nothing seemed to satisfy the need that burned through me. It was to the point where it was nothing but pain, every shift of my thighs sending shocks of agony through my abused sex. Every muscle in my body shook to the point where I had almost no control over my limbs, my teeth chattering together as I lay on the floor. My tongue was thick in my mouth from the all-encompassing thirst that seemed to be an accompanying undercurrent to every sensation, and every small movement made my head swim.

From every window faces leered out of the murkiness that was my awareness. Taunts and jeers that I could only half make out assaulted my ears along with laughter that seemed to echo unnaturally, just like that terrible night in the woods when my parents died. It was like I was stuck in my nightmare, terror gripped me as sulfurous smells overpowered the smells in the trailer and made my stomach roll and heave violently. The whole world was rocking and clamoring like an army was outside of the trailer trying to shake it apart.

Or maybe that was just the pounding of my heart and the shaking of my body.

It seemed real, although with my fever the last bit of my logic knew that I could very well be hallucinating. I couldn't tell what was real or not anymore which was terrifying. In the back of my mind, I knew I was in a whole different kind of trouble if I was bad enough that I was hallucinating both sensations, smell and sound. The part of me that was still rational wanted to break down into hysterical giggles, knowing I was screwed, and that something was very wrong. This was not something I was going to be able to help myself with anymore.

This was it, this is where I died.

My hand itched for the gun as it lay inches from my fingertips, knowing I only had those precious three rounds left. I was tempted, and not for the first time, to turn it on myself; just to make it all stop; the fever, need, voices, taunts, jeers, and that horrible smell that kept making my stomach roll. I could go out on my own terms, and there was no denying that appeal. My mother had always told me that I had enthusiasm for life, but at that moment all I longed for was peace, with every fiber of my being.

Something cold suddenly touched my forehead, and I opened bleary eyes with a start to see a figure crouched over me. It took me a moment to focus, realizing that a new smell was overpowering the sulfurous smell that permeated everything. It smelled like home and safety… like Alpha… it smelled like…

“ _Mom?_ ” My voice was weak and breathy, barely even a whisper of sound.

She smiled down at me, her eyes, the same grey I had inherited, heartbroken and full of tears.

“Oh my baby, minha doce filha."

I tried to lift my hand, to touch her again.

“Mom, it hurts.” I whimpered, even as the sounds that had been all around me started to fade into a low hum in the background.

Her hands, hands which had always been so warm, were freezing as she caressed my face. They felt like a blessing on my fever heated skin. “I know baby,” she said, and her voice sounded like she was crying. I tried to bring her face into sharper focus.

“Please make it stop,” I begged, trying to reach up for her.

“Oh love, it will soon, I promise,” her voice was soft.

The smell in the trailer changing slightly again, no longer smelling like my mother, although it was still comforting. There were other sounds now; sharp sounds, new voices that were different from before, but still distant and not nearly as important as the figure above me. Her face turned away from me and her hands left me, and I whimpered from the loss, trying to reach for her.

“I don’t have much time,” She almost sounded like she was speaking to me underwater, her words almost hard to discern from the pounding in my ears and the throbbing in my head as I tried to push myself up after her, needing her comfort.

Weeping, I cried out for her, “Mama!”

She stood, pulling further away from me. “He will keep you safe from them, Kenzie, por favor seja feliz." Her voice was as soft as a whisper, and when I blinked, she was gone.

I fell back to the disgusting carpet with tears I didn’t know I had the energy for leaking out of my eyes, scarcely aware of the silence that had settled.

And then the door rattled.

**oOo**

At first, I hadn’t been aware that it was a scent I was following, not until the scene had come into view.

From the passenger seat of Baby, Chuck shrank back with a small noise of dismay, swallowing nervously at the scenario that was before us.

It looked like something from an old zombie movie; a random airstream in the road, the sky grey, the land around shriveled and dry, a depressing rain starting to fall. The horde slamming itself against the side of the trailer completed the scene.

Only these weren’t Zombies, these were black-eyed assholes who had taken over a biker gang or something. They were yelling and jeering as they rocked the thing as if they meant to knock it over, which would make sense considering the creature that was pumping the air full of pheromones was probably inside.

“Stay here,” I ordered, my voice a low growl even for me as I put the Impala into park and opened the driver side door. Without pausing I was moving to the trunk to arm myself, keeping an ear on the commotion that surrounded the dilapidated airstream.

They were so lost in the overwhelming scent of heat, a heat that was so thick in the air I could taste it on my tongue, my presence was still completely unknown to them.

Clenching my jaw I tried to control my baser instincts that wanted to take that scent and bask in it, wanted nothing more than to roll in it, savor it in my mouth as I explored the creature it belonged to. The rest of my instincts were screaming at me to murder every last one of the horde of figures that surrounded the trailer. It was housing the owner of the smell that had been luring me to them, apparently since I had stepped out of the bunker. Now the Demons had to die because they were threatening the creature that was supposed to be _mine_.

Cursing under my breath, I tried to reign my Alpha in.

Whoever the Omega was, they smelled like every good thing I could think of. My mouth was watering as if I abruptly had a bacon cheeseburger, with extra onions and a cherry pie, just sitting in front of me, served on a pair of gigantic pillowy tits.

Fuck, an Omega. It was like finding a unicorn.

I closed my eyes and clenched my jaw so hard I briefly wondered if I was going to break a tooth, trying to clear my head even as my cock throbbed in my jeans, reacting to biology I had no control over. No matter what my Alpha instincts were telling me though, the Omega in the trailer needed help, and there was no way I was going to leave them to the horde of Demons that was currently congregating outside.

Especially since the Demons were trying to shake the trailer apart around them, and obviously had no intention of giving up their prey. Either the Demons were simply toying with the Omega, enjoying their terror, or for some reason, they couldn't actually get into the airstream.

It almost felt like I was taking my time as I loaded myself up with a combat shotgun loaded with rock salt, bottle bombs full of holy water and steaks carved from palo santo wood. I confirmed that the demon slaying knife was sheathed in my belt before I shut the trunk, and turned my gaze back to the writhing mass. The group still hadn’t even noticed me, although I was positive that my pheromones were almost at a rutting level, and I felt my lip curl in a snarl as the trunk latched shut. There was going to be an unhealthy level of pleasure on my end watching the bastards burn, and I was looking forward to the satisfaction of the fight more than I should have.

I was surprised when Chuck came to stand beside me as I moved around the Impala, a familiar book under one arm and bullhorn in his hand. His other hand was outstretched for one of the bottle bombs, determination on his narrow bearded face. I raised an eyebrow and then twisted my lips in what I hoped was more of a grin than a snarl, pleased to see the Beta showing some spine in this situation, and I honestly appreciated the backup. There were twenty of them, many of the demons possessing Alphas from what looked to be a pack, and I was planning on taking them all on single-handed… there was a chance the pheromones in the air were causing me to not quite think straight.

We cocked our arms back and I let Chuck give me a nod to let me know he was ready, and then we lobbed the holy water grenades straight into the writhing mass of bodies rocking the trailer.

My grin was wolfish when the glass exploded and splashed against the horde of demons, and before they had a chance to react I moved forward, pumping the rock salt rounds into the seething, hissing, morass. With a roar I caused some of the lesser of the group to physically flinch, surprised by the sudden attack, and panic ensued as the possessed tried to find an escape route.

I ran out of rounds before I closed the distance, and used the stock of the shotgun to knock the first of them back before I discarded the weapon. Wooden steaks then met flesh as I went about ripping them away from the cowering Omega's trailer door, putting them down with a vengeance. Thick black smoke poured into the sky as others turned to flee. Against the disbelieving roar of the possessed Alphas, I drove the holy wood into their chests with a victorious snarl before pulling my knife. Over it all, I could hear Chuck’s voice streaming the Latin incantation of an exorcism that had those able to, fleeing.

One of the demons was standing off to the side, fighting against the pull of Chuck’s invocation, was different enough to catch my attention.  
  
He looked more like a lawyer than a biker, a dark scruff of beard on his face, and eyes that were narrowed in a glare as he stood there in a black suit. Physically he was smaller than the big son of a bitch that was looming over his shoulder, but obviously he was the one in control here. His lip was curled in contempt as he decided to try and size me up and he must not have liked what he saw.

In reaction to his masters displeasure, his 'dog' stepped forward. He was large, an Alpha in his prime, and a fucking skinhead, down to the SS tattoo on his neck.

I was going to enjoy breaking the skinheads fucking neck.

“ **THE BITCH IS OURS!** ” The hulking crater faced biker exploded in impotent fury, trying to shove his Alpha down my throat. The exorcism was forcing him to stay on the edges of the scene, away from the bodies of his little power pack as they littered the ground around my feet.

The noise that came out of me in response wasn’t even human.

Possessiveness came upon me in a wave of ferociousness, and before I knew it I was charging headlong at the other Alpha with a roar. I was only to be brought up short when the smaller dark man snapped his fingers and zapped himself and his dog out of existence, most likely at the end of his tolerance for an exorcism. I was suddenly filled with directionless rage as the coward ran like a chicken shit, having issued a challenge without the fucking balls to back it up. I turned back on the scene with a snarl, but the only one left standing was Chuck with almost a dozen bodies littering the ground around the trailer. He was looking slightly shaken and wild-eyed as he stood there, slowly lowering the megaphone.

“Are they gone?” The Beta asked, a slight tremor in his voice.

I opened my mouth to answer when I heard it.

A whimper; a weak, terrified voice crying out for her mother.

My cold fucking heart _cracked_ like the god damned liberty bell, even as the Alpha in me responded to the pheromones and the vocalization of the mouthwatering thing in the trailer, that rage turning to something more primal. Something that told me to tear that trailer down and take what I had just fought for and won.

There was something else in her scent though, now that I was closer to her… something that had my instincts panicking, and not in the need to mate. Something was very wrong with what I was smelling. It was something that was bringing my rational thought back to the forefront of my brain and making my bastard back down.

As I moved around the trailer looking for the door I noticed the sigils on the windows and felt that smirk come back for just a moment, impressed. This Omega was smart and resourceful. Lipstick. I’d have to remember that one.

My hand hit the door latch and I gave it a try, just in case I was going to get lucky. No dice, but the silence inside the trailer was suddenly deafening at my rattle of the door. Without waiting further I brought my foot down on the latch, forcing the door to pop open, slowly swinging out to me on overstressed hinges. I grabbed the edge of it and stood in the doorway, nostrils flared as I drew a deep breath of that scent that had my cognitive functions shorting out. My cock was throbbing so hard I wanted to start rutting against my zipper for some release, and I could feel a growl rumbling in my chest. Her heat was so thick in the air I could roll it around on my tongue, and I couldn’t help the low growl in my throat becoming audible as my urge to rut became stronger. Never before had I smelled anything so delicious.

At the same time never had I smelled anything so _wrong_.

I bit down on my lip and tried to reign in my libido because I was more than my instincts damnit. This was a scared, injured, unprotected, unbound, ripe, fertile, delicious, vulnerable, wet, in heat Omega…

I took a deep breath through my mouth and shook my head. This wasn’t helping.

When I opened my eyes and actually looked into the trailer I felt like the biggest dick in existence for my uncontrollable boner.

Also, I was incredibly grateful that I was quick because two bullets were suddenly buried in the siding that I had just been in front of. For a heartbeat, there was no sound as I stared at the smoking hole that almost took off my head. Then something I heard had me moving back into the trailer on instinct, despite the gun, just in time to see her put the barrel of the revolver to her head.

“ **NO!** ” I lunged forward even as I watched her finger pull the trigger and… nothing.

Her eyes opened in panic upon realizing the gun hadn’t fired. Before she could do anything else I was on her, my hand closing over the icy metal, hurling it across the trailer with enough force that it echoed. My blood was frozen in my veins even at the thought that she could have just…

Now that I was on top of her I was aware of just how sick she actually was, and just how tiny, as she cringed away from me in complete terror. Her sickly, pale, naked, body was thin to the point of wasting, bones prominently protruding from her thin yellowish skin. There was a feverish glaze over half-lidded eyes that couldn’t seem to focus, peeking out from under limp and matted dark hair that smelled from her sickness even from where I was. She was covered in sweat and slick, but there was a sourness to it that spoke of severe illness. I could feel the heat of a dangerously high fever radiating off her even as her whole body trembled uncontrollably, to the point where I started to worry that she was about to have a seizure.

God knew how long she had been laying there, but judging by the stain on the carpet from her sweat and other things I didn’t want to think about, it had to have been days. I’d heard of suppressant sickness before, but I never thought I’d see it. It had always been one of the major dangers in the pre-apocalyptic world, but with the scarcity of Omegas and the lack of available medicine? The thought of someone dying from something like that was slightly inconceivable. Especially not here, not now.

Not with her.

God, please not with her.

Her chest was heaving as she lay there, staring, shaking like a leaf. I reached for her, only to have my head suddenly snap to the side, courtesy of her fist as it connected solidly with my cheekbone. It didn’t hurt, how could it, weak as she was? It did, however, surprise the hell out of me. She lay beneath me; small, fragile, weak and panting, her body frail and trembling, but her bleary eyes promised murder and a fight.

Slowly I turned my head to look at her, wanting to convey that I meant her no harm. This rescue would have been easier if she was unconscious, and I felt like I was approaching a wounded, wild animal. She had every reason, given the circumstances, to mistrust me, and I was expecting her to lash out again.

Only as I turned my head I watched her stick out her tongue and viciously bite down on it, blood welling and beginning to immediately dribble down her chin.

She kept on the pressure as her teeth sunk further into the muscle, her eyes glaring defiantly into my face even as they couldn’t focus on my own. Her breath was panting heavily out of her nose, either from pain or exertion. In that moment of panic I didn’t know what to do as I realized that she meant to bite off her own tongue to kill herself.

Fuck, she would rather die than be taken alive by a stranger.

I had my hands on her face forcing her jaw open in an instant, my grip probably bruising and painful as I fought with her. My fingers were desperately trying to grab her tongue to try and put some kind of pressure on it, to stem the bleeding. She struggled weakly against me, nails scratching at my hands and arms as she tried to pull away, even as I forced her head to the side to keep her from choking on her own blood. I was trying to ignore how it felt as it trailed hot over my hand and down my forearm, the feeling making me nauseous.

“Goddamnit, Castiel I need you! **NOW!** ” I yelled in desperation, my pulse in my ears and my stomach in my throat. I was barely aware of Chuck sticking his head into the trailer to see what the commotion was about, swearing at what he saw. “ **CAS! PLEASE!** ”

I felt like I was calling and praying and hoping and willing Cas to appear for an eternity before the angel actually deigned to show. His expression was fairly stoned and vacant as he seemed only partially aware of his surroundings as he appeared, in torn jeans and fucking tie-dye, totally barefoot and reeking of pot. There was no time for his bullshit because even as she weakly struggled against me she was fucking dying.

“Goddamnit Cas, **HELP HER** ,” I demanded of the Angel, who blinked and only then seemed to be aware that he wasn’t in the bunker when my Alpha broke through.

He looked owlishly at the sickly Omega as she struggled weakly in my arms, and a troubled expression flitted across his features. I never wanted to punch him so much in my life.

“Dean, my grace... I’m weak, I cannot fix all of…”

“ **JUST KEEP HER FROM DYING** ,” I ordered, every bit of my Alpha in it, which caused the girl in my arms to shudder and sob. She flinched away from me even as her Omega reacted to my Alpha, her slick blossoming fresh in the air.

Fuck, she smelled like everything I had ever wanted.

Cas snapped his trap shut, finally, and moved to put his fingers on her forehead even as she tried to curl her thin, shaking body as far away from us as possible. There was nothing to her, and it was wrecking me in every way.

I looked away with a scowl as he gently placed his fingers against her overly hot skin, trying to stomp out the Alpha in me that wanted to rip his arm off for daring to touch her. She sucked in a shuddering breath through her mouth as suddenly the bleeding ceased, her body going limp. I moved my grip to cradle the back of her head gently and looked back at her face. She was unconscious, her lashes fluttering against her sunken cheek, her breath escaping chapped lips with a sigh.

It was like something came over me as I just looked at her for a moment, kinda lost. When Cas stepped back to give me enough room to try and pick her up, to get her out of the disgusting trailer she had been forced to seek refuge in, her eyes fluttered open again. In a blind panic and she weakly struggled against me, trying to pull away even though she lacked the strength to escape a wet paper bag. She was sobbing and whimpering in a manner that was killing me.

I scooped her frail form into my arms, ignoring her weak struggles as I clutched her firmly to my chest and stood up from the floor. The sudden movement caused her head to loll listlessly against my arm, her whole body becoming boneless again. Panic gripped me for a moment, but I realized she was breathing and I could feel her heart beating steadily through her skin. She was just passed out, not actually in danger. Even the sour smell was gone, although she was still saturated with sweat, and her fever had lowered from life-threatening to alarming.

I needed to get her home, to safety, where I could help her.

Maybe, if I was lucky, she could help me too, because if nothing else there was one thing I knew.

I needed her.


	2. Understandings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Understanding can be a double edged sword, and in a world of harsh realities it's hard to believe that the sun might actually peek out from behind the clouds when the sky has been so dark for so long. 
> 
> There's only so much fight in a person, and sometimes risks are worth taking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This damned thing has taken on a life of it's own. Like... way crazy at this point. My muse is cackling with glee, and there's some... interesting things in store for the near future. Stay tuned I guess? I will be updating as I finish sections.

There was a slight tremble and rumble to my world that was new to my awareness; a steady rhythmic swish noise over something that made an abstractly patterned tempo accompanying the growling rumble. I was somewhere warm, dry, and soft. All around me I smelled something delicious and safe, both comforting and familiar, while at the same time sending little unwanted waves of panic through my wavering consciousness.

I wanted to ignore the panic. I couldn’t remember the last time I had felt so content and strangely safe. The pain and weakness that had been radiating through my body were hazy and distant, and for the first time in recent memory, I was comfortable. So I burrowed deeper into the soft leather all around me, pressing my face into that wonderful smell that seemed to be working an unknown magic, and sighed.

“I think she’s waking up.”

My eyes flew open at the slightly monotonous, rough, male tone.

The panic that had been in the back of my consciousness was immediately dominating my body. Suddenly I was moving, previous pain and weakness be damned. In the same instant, the smell that had been so comforting was terrifying in its connotations alone.

Flailing wildly, I shoved myself away from the man I was laying near. The worn brown leather jacket that had been covering me fell to the floorboards of the car I was apparently in as my bare back hit the cold glass behind me as I pressed myself into the door. My head whipped around as I took in what I could about my surroundings like the cornered terrified animal I was.

The Alpha in the driver's seat swore and swerved violently at my outburst. Bright eyes were wide in the rearview mirror even as the smaller bearded man next to him spun in his seat with a startled yell. The man who was sitting next to me was looking at me with wide blue eyes and a slack-jawed expression. He looked so startled by my outburst that almost made me feel guilty when my foot lashed out and landed square in the middle of his face. The Alpha slammed on the brakes, causing the car to skid on the asphalt, which catapulted me into the back of the front seat.

The impact was softened by the upholstery as I crumpled to the floorboards on my back, falling onto the floor space. I didn't take the time to try and crawl back onto the seat as the car was suddenly filled with raised voices. The blue-eyed man was holding a hand to his bleeding nose, mouth moving saying something I couldn't hear over my pulse as he stared unblinkingly at me in that same startled manner. He remained unmoving even as I reached blindly above my head for the door handle. When I popped the latch I heard a swear from the front seat as the door swung open. Immediately I tumbled out of the car onto the wet asphalt, the rain chilling my skin as it misted down over the late summer landscape, obscuring our surroundings.

The grit was agony against my flesh when I crumpled to the ground, and I hissed back a scream as I commanded my failing body to move. I couldn't seem to get my legs under me as I heard his feet hit the pavement as desperately I tried to scramble away, no real direction in mind. I couldn't think any further than escape. I _knew_ what happened to captured Omegas.

Huge, rough, hands were on me, and suddenly I was rolled onto my back, a solid body between my naked skin and the asphalt. The cold rain that misted out of the sky was a sharp contrast to the heat that radiated from his large body, and my Omega perked up even as I felt my adrenaline spike when I realized just how huge and solid he was. His arms felt like a hot steel trap around my body as he tangled his legs with mine as I struggled in vain against him. He was holding my flailing limbs with no apparent effort on his part aside from the effort it took to hold himself still, his obvious strength apparent. I was laughably overpowered. There was a commotion all around us, but I couldn’t make it out through the tears of desperation blurring my vision. My breath was burning in my lungs and my pulse pounded in my ears as I kept on struggling, refusing to give up. Giving up meant death, or worse.

So much worse.

When I felt his erection grinding into my ass I keened out a wail that I had no control over, sobbing. I was aware that although my heat had ebbed, the lingering pheromones had not completely abated and I still reeked, I knew that wouldn’t matter to an Alpha if all he wanted was a hole. It made my struggle more desperate.

“For the love of god **_STOP_**.” His voice was a dangerous growl even as he barked out the order, the push in his voice unmistakable and desperate.

I froze in instinctual recognition of the Alpha command. His nose suddenly buried itself under my chin as he held me still from behind, his hot breath was washing over my neck, causing his chest to swell behind me. He was like a furnace, and it made my skin pimple with goosebumps even as I shivered. Both my instincts and the Alpha command had me wanting to bare more of my neck to him as I felt his nose rubbing against my skin again as breathed me in.

He was scenting me, _fuck_.

I simply trembled as he lay there, unmoving underneath me for a mini-eternity. I was holding my breath from fear, waiting in terror for his teeth to sink in. Enough time passed that I was forced to exhale, and I reflexively swallowed. The physical act of swallowing seemed to break the spell that had been cast over the moment, and time started moving again. Suddenly his hot breath was no longer there, and I heard his head thunk against the blacktop as he begged, “Please, for the love of god, just… _stop_.”

_What?_

It was the same command as before, but at the same time not, even slightly, the same command. There was no push, and there was something earnest in his voice, something...

I held myself as still as possible, not able to control my shaking or my shuddering breathing. My body was completely tense, ready to start fighting again, but my head was swimming in confusion. My fading fever and my panic were making it hard to form a coherent thought, and I had been so prepared for the worst, for pain and disregard, that I wasn’t sure what to do with… this.

“Dean?” The hesitant voice made me blink, and fat tears rolling out of my eyes and clearing my vision. I looked up to see the small man with the beard from earlier standing by the hood of the large black classic mid 60's car. A car, I noted, I had managed to crawl an embarrassingly short distance from. He was holding out his hands as if he wasn’t sure what to do.

“Hold on.” The order was harsh, but there was no force to it. The Beta still obeyed.

Movement out of the corner of my eye caught my attention and I flinched violently as the man I had kicked in the face came into view from the back of the car, expecting aggression. Stopping by the tail light, he made no move to approach us further, the front of his loud tie-dye shirt stained with his blood. He was staring at me with a strange mix of surprise and curiosity that I didn't know how to process. Even though he was holding a rag to his probably busted nose, there was no malice in his gaze.

The Alpha continued to hold me tightly, his big body still enough that I almost forgot that his erection was grinding into my ass. Despite his obvious arousal though, he wasn't acting on it, and that fact gave me pause. A few moments passed before he became convinced I wasn't going to try anything stupid, not that I would obviously get far.

Slowly he sat up as if it was nothing, my body pressed against the solid heat of him keeping me warm despite the rain. We were both soaked when gradually his arms loosening their hold, although he in no way let me go. His long legs were stretched around me, his ankles crossed to form a small cage out of his limbs. Still, I pulled myself as far away from him as possible and twisted in his arms so I could look at him, huddled in on myself as water dripped off the end of my nose.

Everything I had experienced since the end of the world screamed at me that I was in an incredible amount of danger. There were no terrible stories out there about Omegas that I hadn't seen validated with my very own eyes. We were nothing in this world; something to be hurt, used, discarded and destroyed. When Alphas found us, they hurt us, period. A found Omega was a dead Omega, it was just a matter of time.

Now I found myself huddled in the arms of an Alpha, and while my logical brain was screaming at me to flee, my every base instinct was telling me that here, in his presence, I was safe. It was unnerving because I had no idea who the hell this man even _was_ , and yet I could feel myself being put at ease simply by his scent and immediate proximity.

My eyes were on his throat, and when he swallowed, like before when I had, it broke the silent stillness that had settled.

Slowly I dragged my eyes up to his stubble covered jaw, over a full pink mouth that he licked nervously as he held still, sharp white teeth visible within as I watched him exhale for a moment through slightly parted lips. He had a straight, surprisingly narrow nose dusted in freckles, but there was a slight tweak to it that spoke of a previous break. As I finally tried to look into his eyes, I couldn’t help the trembling that increased as I wondered what I would actually find there. Everything in me told me that meeting the eyes of a strange Alpha was going to get me hurt.

My shaking had his dark, sandy eyebrows pulled into a slight scowl that seemed to be a familiar expression on his face, and dimly I noted that his eyes were actually green. He was very still, breathing quietly as his eyes then danced over my face, misting rain collecting on long eyelashes, probably trying to gauge how I was going to react. To be fair at this point I wasn’t sure how I was going to react myself because I didn’t know if I actually trusted what I was seeing.

“I’m not gonna hurt you.” He finally said. His voice was apparently a perpetual growl.

I swallowed, feeling bold as I looked into his eyes, considering what I was. He didn’t seem to mind it as he looked back at me though. I wanted to believe him. I honestly wanted to believe him more than almost anything in that moment.

“Ok.”

**oOo**

“Ok.”

I blinked, a little shocked at the soft word. She had drawn her legs up when we had sat up and now her knees were huddled against her chest, her body pressing away from me even in the circle of my arms and legs. She was the smallest she could make herself. An obvious tremor was wracking her too, and she was shaking from more than just the rain. I don’t think she was even aware she was still hiccoughing small sobs.

She looked like a miserable terrified half-drowned cat ready to bolt. Given all that, the concession was… unexpected.

“Ok?” I asked.

She didn’t take her eyes off me, her hair plastered to her scalp from the rain, and gave a small nod, licking her lips, not willing to give me any more than that.

I'd take it.

To be fair though, I was just happy that she seemed to be coherent and fully conscious. Apparently, even if she was still obviously terrified, she was willing to work with me when I extended out an olive branch. The idea of holding her against her will didn't sit well with me, but the thought of her leaving I wasn't sure I could abide. Her heat also seemed to be fading though, thank god, which was making it a little easier to think coherently around her.

Not that it was stopping my Alpha from completely making an appearance. I felt pretty terrible that I had scared her by my dick being a dick when she had been struggling against me, but that had been a part of my nature I couldn't help. Just like I couldn't help it when my nose had been filled with the enticing smell of her flesh. It had taken me an embarrassingly long moment to get control of myself.

I looked up when Cas stepped closer to us and was grateful when he held out my jacket that had been discarded in the back seat during her sudden flight.

His expression was more poignant than I’d seen it in a long time as he looked down at the tiny thing that hadn’t stopped looking at me. I kept an arm wrapped around her even as I reached out for the worn brown leather, watching as the thing enveloped her in an almost comical fashion, knees and all. Skeletal fingers drew the edges of it close into her body, and I couldn’t help myself as I brought my hand up and brushed her dark, wet hair out of her face before rubbing my thumb against her too sharp cheekbone as she continued to watch me. I gave her a little smile and then, without much more preamble gathered her up and stood to put her back into Baby.

She gasped, her body shuddering hard, and her hand shot out of the folds of my jacket to grab onto my shirt so tightly I heard the wet fabric rend.

It made my heart swell as she hid her face in my chest at the sudden movement. It made me want to coddle her against me with everything I had, shelter her from the world, and I couldn't help when my arms tightened a fraction. There was a gear bag in the trunk that I knew for a fact outweighed the slightly wild creature in my arms, and that hit me like a punch in the gut. I found myself planting a kiss on the top of her wet head as I set her back down in the back seat, her fingers shaking as she released the fabric of my shirt. I couldn’t help myself when I reached out to touch her cheek again, giving her what I hoped was a reassuring smile before pulling away.

Her eyes stayed locked on me even as I shut the door.

When I looked away I found Cas standing on the other side of Baby, a slightly knowing look on his smug angel face even as he continued to hold the rag to his busted nose. It was a look I honestly hadn’t seen on him in years.

“What?” I demanded gruffly.

He just gave me a damned smirk and climbed into the car.

*

Sometime on the way back to the bunker she fell asleep, a true sleep, curled up against the door completely hiding in my jacket.

If I didn’t know she was there I would almost think she had disappeared, the old worn leather encompassed her so completely not even the dark top of her head visible. Neither Chuck nor Castiel said anything on the drive. Chuck was scowling as he tried to come to terms with what the implications were with this girl, and Cas was being, well, Cas, whatever that entailed. Personally, I had to keep on reminding myself to watch the road instead of watching her sleep in the mirror, but a part of me couldn’t believe that she was actually there.

If it wasn't for the rhythmic movement of her breathing I would have been constantly pulling over to reassure myself that she hadn't vanished like a ghost.

It was no secret that Omegas were hunted, actively, by the demons that now plagued the earth, as if they hadn’t been scarce enough before. There were many horror stories about Omegas that had been discovered with Alphas that were too weak to protect them, of the markets where Omega flesh went for top dollar, shit like that. Families would even surrender Omegas to those hunting them for protection. No matter what the situation it never ended well for the Omega, and one all alone had no protection at all.

It made my Alpha snarl with rage, causing my hands to tighten involuntarily on the steering wheel, because to my Alpha the unbonded Omega already belonged to him.

Unbonded. It still blew my mind. The chances of even seeing an Omega in one's lifetime had dwindled down to next to nothing over the last few years, but to find an unbound Omega, here? If the lottery was still a thing I’d be buying a ticket.

Yet there was no denying who was in my back seat.

She didn’t wake up when I pulled into the bunker's garage, the rain now falling heavier, and shut off Baby. It was then that Chuck turned to me, casting a glance back at her.

“So… what now?” He asked in the silence that had settled, the first words to be spoken in hours.

I looked at him before pulling the keys out of the ignition. “Now I keep her safe,” I answered honestly.

*

In the back of my mind, I wondered what kind of picture I was painting, considering how solicitous Castiel was being. Gently I moved to get her sleeping form out of the back seat as he helped me make sure she didn’t tumble out of the car. Her face immediately nuzzled into my shirt without waking up, making my chest feel constricted with something I didn’t want to think about and more than I already had been.

I stood there for a moment and marveled at the feel of her small body in my arms. She was such a tiny thing I was pretty sure I could carry her with one arm easily. The fact that she still hadn't stirred was a sign of instinctive trust that was more than I could have hoped for. I looked up and motioned with my chin for the door. Thankfully I didn’t need to ask twice as Chuck turned and opened the hatch of the bunker, quietly holding it open for me and my precious cargo.

Heading straight for my room I blew by Bobby as he sat in the library, whose jaw dropped when he saw what I was carrying. Knowing I was going to have to talk to him sooner rather than later, I decided to head straight to my room to first.

It didn’t even cross my mind to take her anywhere else as I gently lay her on the bed, feeling myself smile a little as she burrowed into my pillow and sighed into a deeper sleep. I ran my hand over her now dry hair before I pulled the blanket up over her curled form, not even bothering to remove my jacket from her shoulders. Hopefully, she got a chance to sleep soundly for a while, because I needed to try and pull myself away from her for a moment so I could figure out just what the fuck I was supposed to do now. This had not exactly been my plan when I had stepped out of the door at dawn, damnit. I was a hunter, hunters didn't do... this.

I needed a beer.

Bobby was waiting as I stepped out of my room, but I frowned at him and held up a finger to my lips even as his mouth opened. There was no way any conversation we were about to have wouldn't wake her if we had it right there in the damned hallway. He gave me _that_ look, which had me rolling my eyes and jerking my head towards the kitchen. He made a sarcastic hand gesture that had me shaking my head even as I pulled the door quietly closed behind me, wanting to give her the chance to rest.

The moment I entered the tiled room I moved to the far wall and pulled open the icebox, ignoring everyone who moved into the room behind me. Rummaging through the fridge I could feel the weighted stares on my back and turned with four of our precious ‘Castiel’s special microbrew’ supplies in hand. Sitting down at the table I set them down in front of me.

For a moment no one joined me, so I shrugged, picking up mine and saluting the three jackasses that were just staring at me as I took a long drink. It was not the first time I was grateful that the Angel had decided to start partaking when the world had ended, not that I would tell him that. It would probably on encourage him to grow more damned weed.

Chuck was the first of them to break ranks as he snatched his beer and took the seat to my right, followed swiftly by Bobby across from him and Cas directly across from me. He had tissues stuffed up his nose to deal with the bleeding, bruising forming in crescents under his eyes from the kick he had received. It looked like it hurt, but it was also a little funny to see the Angel looking like a tissue walrus. Cas would be ok when he had recovered enough to heal himself anyway.

We all took long swigs before Bobby broke the silence.

“So… an Omega? Dean, where did you even find her?”

I took another swallow, shrugging a little, not really wanting to get an earful over the risk I had taken when I had come across her. “A trailer on the old highway.”

“A trailer under siege,” Chuck muttered into his beer, deliberately loud enough to make sure Bobby could hear him. I shot him a sour look, even as Bobby rounded on me with _that_  look on his face again. I swear, sometimes the man could out bitch face Sam.

"How under siege?" he groused.

I made a face as I pretended to think about it, "Baker's dozen?" I lied, earning me a sharp look from Chuck. It was still more than enough to make Bobby swear.

“Boy, are you outta your damned mind?” He demanded, his tone incredulous.

I scowled at him and motioned towards my bunk with my bottle, where the person under discussion was currently sleeping. “What was I supposed to do? Just leave her there?”

Just saying it had my stomach in hard knots, and I took a sip of the beer to loosen them. I couldn't even imagine not going to her. My hand tightened on the bottle's neck as my Alpha raged at the very thought.

“Well, no, but…” He glanced back at the hall with a frown, the crags of his old face pulled into a deep scowl. “Shit.” He looked at me again, incredulous surprise suddenly plain on his face. “An Omega. An honest to god Omega. I didn’t even think they existed anymore.”

I took another swallow of my drink, “Yeah, well, neither did I.”

“What are we even gonna do with her?”

“What do you mean?” I couldn’t help the angry thread in my tone, my inner Alpha rearing his head like the asshole he was at the question. I took another swallow, trying to reign him in as I sought to answer the old man, not managing to lessen my scowl, however. “She’s going to stay here of course. She’s not safe out there on her own.”

Bobby opened his mouth, but another voice beat him to it.

“You didn’t see it,” Chuck intoned quietly as he frowned at the memory of what we had seen that morning, his eyes slightly distant as he looked at the bottle in his hands. “They wanted to rip her apart.”

Draining my bottle I wondered if I should open another, or go for the special stash of hard stuff I had grabbed from a smashed out liquor store not too long ago. When I spoke my voice came out with a low growl that made me inwardly wince because it said what I wasn't willing to vocalize. My Alpha claimed her. Period.

All I said though was, “Even if it was safe for her out there, she needs time to recover, and heal, from whatever she’s been through.”

Across the table Cas put down his beer as he nodded, frowning. “I did what I could, but with how things are… she’s no longer in imminent danger if that’s any consolation.” His voice was slightly comical given the fact that his face had been smashed, but I knew what he meant. Beating the reaper on this one had been a very near thing. He didn't have to say it as he lifted his beer to his lips again.

“Do you intend to claim her?” The old man asked me bluntly.

If a glare could kill a man Bobby would be six feet under, “What the fuck do you take me for, man?”

“An Alpha,” he barked, “an Alpha that hasn’t seen an Omega in years, much less an unbonded one.”

“Man, she’s fucking terrified, and she’s sick. I may be a lot of things, but I’m not a fucking rapist.”

“I just wanna be sure you can keep your hormones in check with her here, or do I need to make sure she’s in a safe room?” He raised an eyebrow, challenging me in the way that only Bobby Singer could, and at that moment I wondered if he realized he was actually lucky in this instant that was a Beta.

I couldn’t help the growl in the back of my throat as my Alpha suddenly started sizing Bobby up as a threat to the Omega. Honestly, I didn’t do much to reign it in when I spoke again because sometimes the old man needed to be reminded that even though I loved him like a father, I _was_ still an Alpha. The implication that I would assault her... that I would be one of those bastards that had been attacking her, that I would be one of the fucking _bad guys_ , made me see red.

" **I would never do anything to hurt her**."

With that, I shoved away from the table and reached for the whiskey, because fuck it. Now I needed the hard stuff or I was gonna swing at him. The image of how I had found her flashed through my mind, the echoes of the crude jeers and taunts echoing in my ears. The things they had been telling her they wanted to do to her, promising her they would do to her...

Swallowing down the first glass, I poured my second before I turned back around, well aware that I was being judged for how I was reacting to this situation. Fuck it, they didn’t know what this was like; how my inability to have protected her before I even knew her was filling me with an impotent rage that didn’t yet have an outlet. However, it was looking. Man, was it looking. The fact that she had ever, for an instant, been in danger made me want to fucking kill something.

“Dean,” Bobby’s voice was way too reasonable. “This is exactly what I was talking about.”

"How the fuck am I supposed to react, huh?" I snapped at him, not trying to curb my snarl. "How the fuck am I supposed to react when you fucking imply that I might goddamn _rape her_?!"

“Bobby,” I was surprised that Castiel was the one speaking up. “Dean found her while she was in heat.”

Bobby whipped his head between the two of us so hard I wondered if he was going to pull something, “Shit, sorry kid.”

I swallowed down the rest of my drink, my voice tight and my barely controlled anger evident when I spoke, “Don’t mention it.”

He sat back in his chair at that, obviously aware that he had dodged a bullet, and silence settled over us as we drank. I was trying to bring myself back under control, not liking being so on edge and hyper-aware of everything. My Alpha was waiting for something, but what it was I didn't know, when a noise caught my attention, a faint thing that shouldn't have even registered. My heart stuttered a little when I realized it was the latch on my bedroom door.

I was moving before any of the guys even grasped what had happened.

**oOo**

Stepping gingerly into the hallway I quickly realized I had no idea where I was, like, at all.

Well, aside from the Alpha's room. He was named Dean if my memory from the road served me. I doubted I would have any trouble finding my way back here with the way his smell leaked out of it. I tried to pretended I didn't find comfort in that thought as I moved out into the hallway, trying to figure out where the hell I was.

The architecture looked official, but like something out of an old black and white movie, and it almost looked like we were underground... so a basement of some kind? The room I had been in had a brass number eleven on the door, so at least there was apparently some kind of reason to this place. It had a slightly cavernous feeling as I glanced back and forth, trying to make a decision as to direction. My bare feet were silent as I shuffled a few feet across the cold stone floor towards where there was at least a light source.

Obviously, that was the direction everyone was, considering that the Alpha suddenly appeared at the end of the hall.

He looked almost surprised to see me as I stood there in the open, frozen stock still at the sight of him, holding his leather jacket around my shoulders almost like it was armor. It wasn’t really like I had anything else to wear, so I hadn't wanted to discard it, but I was swimming in the thing as it hung down to below my mid-thigh.

It just proved that the man was freaking huge. I mean, my dad had been a pretty big guy, but it had been different in almost every way. My dad had been the Omega in our family. He'd never had a presence like... this.

Dean began to move towards me, his gate loose as he moved forwards on bowed legs as I stood, rooted to the spot. He moved with a deliberate grace, none of his movements sudden, and I kinda felt like he was approaching me like I was a wild animal. It wasn’t until he drew near to me that I realized just how tall he was, towering over me by almost a full foot, his shoulders broad, chest solid, and his green gaze unnervingly predatory despite his attempts to be as unthreatening as possible. Even though he hadn’t done anything to hurt me, it was hard to ignore the ingrained terror his approach triggered. His eyes were searching my face for something before he spoke.

“Did you need something Princess?” His voice was so low it made me wonder if he smoked cigarettes or simply ate them to get that growl.

I swallowed, my mouth still dry, and hesitated a moment, unsure of how to answer him. That was both a complicated and a simple question that had more than one answer. The unexpected need to relieve myself upon waking was the driving force behind my exploration, however, and the first issue I needed to address.

“Princess?” I think he mistook my indecision for being tongue tied out of fear if his expression and furrowed brow were anything to go by, and he looked like a kicked puppy for a moment, “All you have to do is ask, and if I can do it, it’s yours.”

Well, if that didn’t make a girls heart flutter.

I swallowed again before I forced my tongue to work past my weakness, even though my voice still lacked strength and sounded dry as dust.

“I... umm...," how the hell did one ask a question like this anymore even as I stood there fidgeting? "Do you.... have a place I can...?"

I trailed off, stilling as I looked past him at the people that had come up; the two from before along with another Beta who looked like he was old enough to be Dean’s father. His beard was more grey than red with a faded green truckers hat firmly on his head and outfit to match. He was looking at me like I was going to suddenly shoot lightning bolts out of my ass or something, although he didn't seem overly threatening. It probably would have done me good to study him a bit longer, but my eyes flicked back to Dean. I didn’t want to look away from the Alpha for long and cursed myself inwardly when he approached and I instinctively shrank back a step.

He clenched his teeth, causing a muscle in his cheek to twitch, but then simply motioned to the other direction down the hall apparently understanding what I had been asking.

I stepped aside and then quietly turned to follow him, allowing him to guide me, his pace slow to match mine. If we were accompanied, I didn't notice. My eyes were constantly flickering over him as I took in his body language. I was trying not to notice how he was clenching his fists and jaw the entire time we were walking, not sure if I wanted to know why he was doing that.

Objectively I knew that I was the cause, but as much as the gesture was threatening, I didn't _feel_ threatened, which puzzled me. I should feel threatened. I should feel terrified. I was somewhere unknown, naked, surrounded by strange men, and it was the end of the world. By rights, I should be in fucking hysterics running for my life from these people, instead of letting some strange Alpha lead me deeper into the bowels of his freaking fortress.

I didn't really pay attention to how far down we traveled before he stopped in front of a dark wooden door that simply said "toilet" in brass letters and pushed it open. He switched on the light as we stepped into the tiled room, and my eyes took everything in. It was clean, white tiled with multiple stalls. It was also something I had never expected to use again.

"I'll just be... waiting outside," he said as I stepped past him and he let the door close between us.

*

He had a scowl on his face as he glared at the floor as if it had offended him when I opened the door. His eyes jumped up to me when I emerged, and while his scowl didn't lessen for some reason it didn't frighten me. Stationed across the hall with his arms crossed over his chest, he didn't immediately move.

"Better?" He asked.

I felt myself nodding and then licked my chapped lips, taking my eyes off him for a moment to look up and down the hall. When my eyes settled back on him, his expression had changed, but his brow was still furrowed. He was studying me closely as if he was trying to read my mind or guess at a question I didn't know to ask. When he finally pushed away from the wall I once again found myself rooted to the spot as he approached, only this time I didn't flinch back. Not even when he reached up to brush his fingertips over my cheek to push some hair behind my ear. The expression on his face was worth it.

"Are you hungry?" His voice was quiet, almost reverent, "Or would you like to take a shower?"

At the word shower every ounce of tension in my body left in my shock, and my incredulous disbelief must have been plain on my face because it was thick in my voice when I said flatly, "A shower?"

Bullshit.

He chuckled at me, his countenance lightening a little at my reaction even as he motioned to a nearby door that, like the bathroom, had brass lettering that said "shower". When he pushed open that door and flickered on the light he revealed a room similar to the bathroom and reminiscent of a locker room, I was stunned speechless.

Holy. Shit.

“There’s plenty of hot water, and I’ll make sure to have a towel and something for you to change into, ok?” he said as he pulled back the shower curtain on one of the stalls. He turned on the tap, testing the temperature with his hand, before stepping back to give me some room. “I’ll also make sure there’s something for you to eat when you get out.”

My eyes were glued onto the falling water as I pulled his jacket from around my shoulders and held it out to him, standing nude on the tile, too shocked to even think about what I was doing or who I was in front of. A shower. An honest to god fucking shower.

He moved slowly as he reached for it, saying, “Yell if you need anything, ok? I’ll be right back with… that other stuff.”

With that he bolted, leaving me alone. I turned and stepped under the spray, a noise escaping me that didn’t belong in polite society.

Hot water. No words can adequately describe how good a hot water shower feels after not having had one for years, and for thinking that you were never going to have one again. It was enough to make me cry, and I just stood there with my face up in the spray, unabashedly swallowing a few warm mouthfuls to ease my parched throat as my tears were washed away.

*

It must have been hours later that I finally turned off the water. Stepping out I found a towel sitting on the bench just outside of the curtain. Folded next to it were a Led Zepplin t-shirt and a pair of drawstring gym shorts that looked pretty comical on me, but at least the waist allowed me to cinch them so that they wouldn’t fall off my overly bony form. I looked ridiculous in the huge clothing, but I was supremely grateful for the clean garments. Even if I hadn’t destroyed my clothes in my heat, they had been in embarrassingly rough condition compared to what I was wearing now.

I shuffled to the door after towel drying my hair, peering out into the hall, unsure of where to go or what to do with myself. The promise of food, however, had me willing to explore again.

Not that it was needed. Immediately the smaller Beta with the beard from the car looked up from the book he was reading as he sat across the hall. He'd had his back resting against the wall and scrambled to his feet when I peeked out, the book snapping shut in his haste. With a small hint of embarrassment at his rushed fumbling, he smiled cautiously at me. His body posture was easy even though he didn’t approach me, giving me space to decide what I wanted to do. I appreciated it, even though I found it slightly off-putting. This was not the kind of reception Omegas received anymore.

“Hi,” he ventured, “You’re probably starving, wanna come with me…?”

A silence stretched for a moment, and it was only then that I realized he was waiting for me to respond.

“...MacKenzie,” I finally offered, which caused some of the tension in his face to relax, his smile becoming a bit more genuine. “I used to go by Kenzie.”

“Chuck.” he motioned down the hall, and I moved to follow him. “I’m going to guess that you have questions?”

When he looked over his shoulder at me at my verbal silence I gave him a bit of a nod before I looked around at the surrounding building. I couldn't help marveling at not only the architecture but the sheer size of the place as he led me through the labyrinth. Appeased by my nod and apparently seeing my distraction he gave a hum of acknowledgment and led me into the nearby kitchen, where a bowl of soup sat steaming on the table, next to a large glass of water. It was nothing special, nothing fancy, simply a big bowl of basic, condensed chicken noodle soup.

When that first bite passed my lips I physically moaned, because I had literally never tasted anything better, and I was a goddamned chef before the world ended. I couldn’t help myself as I scarfed the food and water down like I was literally starving, knowing in the back of my mind that I was eating too fast. When I was about halfway done with the bowl I forced myself to sit back, putting down the spoon, holding a slightly embarrassed hand to my mouth as I swallowed. I had just been shoveling food into my mouth like a pig at a slop trough.

“Sorry,” I muttered to Chuck, who had settled across the table from me, his face carefully neutral even as I felt myself flush.

He smiled again, very disarmingly, his eyes sad. “It’s fine, we figured you would be hungry.”

I gave a humorless little laugh. “Understatement of the century.” I hid a little burp behind my hand, “Excuse me.”

“So, do you?” He finally asked after silence stretched between us again as I swirled my spoon through the shimmering yellow broth, trying to remind myself to take it slowly even though the soup might as well have been ambrosia.

I cocked my head at him, taking my eyes off the bowl that had hypnotized me in mild confusion.

“Have questions.” He clarified.

“Oh! Yes, of course.” I pushed the bowl of food away from me, aware that my gut was now rumbling from what I had already consumed, wanting to give it a chance to settle so I didn’t make myself sick.

"What would you like to know first?"

"Where are we?" I asked as I looked around. The kitchen we were in was obviously designed for a large group of people, but while these guys could definitely be considered a group they were not nearly numerous enough to be the only ones here. So far though I got the feeling that I wasn't really going to be meeting anyone else with these guys anytime soon.

"A secure bunker in Lebanon Kansas." He replied immediately as he looked around with a small smile, "So far it's been totally safe, and has power and water although we're not sure how. We're just grateful although we kinda wish we'd found it a little sooner."

"Is it just you guys or...?"

"You've met all of us that are left," Chuck said sadly, and then chuckled again, "Castiel is the guy you kicked in the face, and then, of course, you know Dean. You haven't had a chance to actually meet Bobby yet, but that is it."

"Have you guys been together long?" my curiosity got the better of me as I wondered if the Alpha just made a habit of picking people up he found.

"Since the beginning actually." His response surprised me. "We were all friends from before, so when everything went to hell we stuck together. We've been looking out for each other ever since."

"That's... wow." My heart ached for those I had lost, and I looked away from him so that he couldn't see the expression on my face. I wish I had been that lucky.

"How long have you been on your own?"

His question was careful and quiet, and when I looked up at him his expression was earnest. It took me a moment before I could bring myself to respond because it had been long enough that I really had to think about it. Thinking about it, and everything I had been through, was bringing up memories I would have rather kept buried.

"Almost three years," I whispered finally, slightly ashamed at the way my voice trembled. I was well aware that every ounce of my weakness had been audible in that moment.

Dropping my eyes back to the surface of the table, I rubbed my finger agitatedly over the edge of it, trying to school myself. I could feel tears building in my eyes again, and my face growing flushed with emotion. I didn't know what to do with being this out of control and overwhelmed. When a hand reached across the table and suddenly rested over mine I stilled and looked back up into Chuck's sincere face.

"No one will hurt you here."

I felt my breathing grow harsher, the tears threatening to spill.

"Why not?" I breathed.

"We won't let them."


	3. Am I dreaming?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenzie and Dean feel each other out a little, both very unsure of what the future will hold.

I don't know how long I sat there warring with myself, trying not to fall apart as his words bounced around in my head as his hand continued to rest over mine, being my only anchor point to reality. The tears I had been fighting fell freely down my face, dripping off my chin as I sat there trembling.

_No one will hurt you here._

_We won't let them._

My body flushed hot and cold as I wavered between joy and despair. My breathing became more labored as I continued to silently cry as I stared at Chuck unblinkingly. He just stared back at me with heartbrokenly earnest tear-filled eyes, clasping my hand securely as if he knew that he was the only thing keeping me at that moment from flying apart. Experience had me wanting to scream that he was a liar, that this all had to be some kind of trap and they had to be toying with me for some reason beyond my comprehension. There was no reason for these people to be kind to me. There was no reason for an _Alpha_  to be kind to me.

Yet...

His smell washed over me just as the Beta looked up, but I was frozen as I felt his presence come up behind me. At the comforting smell of him, the tears stopped actively falling although my heart continued to pound away in my chest.

The chair was obscenely loud as it scraped over the floor when he pulled it out.

The big body of the Alpha settled in next to me making every cell in my body instantly aware of him. It seemed an eternity before I was able to turn my head and look, only to find him watching me with a guarded expression. I fought with the parts of myself that screamed that I was both about to die and that I had never been safer simultaneously as I peered into his face. Something shifted in his expression, and looking away he reached out with a deliberate slowness to pick up the dishrag that had been resting on the table. Bringing it to my cheeks, he lightly wiped away my tears, causing my breath to shudder softly out of me at the touch. His jaw ticked again like it had in the hall when I met his olive gaze, but he broke the eye contact first, sights dropping to the half-empty bowl of soup on the table before us.

My stomach let out an embarrassingly loud growl at that exact moment.

Chuck's hand retreated from mine as the Alpha's large paw reached for the bowl to move it back in front of me, saying softly, "you really should finish eating."

I felt myself nod and watched almost detached as my hand reached for the discarded spoon again. Mechanically I brought another spoonful of the soup up to my mouth, chewed and swallowed, but every bit of my attention was focused on the big body next to me. He was an Alpha, and rationally that meant he was inherently dangerous. However, at the exact same time, every innate instinct had me ready to curl up in his lap and start purring in contentment.

When I was finished I brought the bowl up to my lips to drink down the last of the broth, no one saying anything until I set the ceramic back down and contemplated the tall man who was seemingly my savior. His expression was unreadable as he watched me for a moment, and then his eyes flicked back to the bowl. The Beta continued to sit silently across from us, watching the whole exchange.

"Are you still hungry?"

The huge Alpha kept his rough voice pitched low, his words measured as if he was afraid of saying something wrong or speaking too loudly. It was so strange, to see the trepidation in his eyes and the quiet way he carried his big body as he sat there, trying so hard to be non-menacing. It seemed like he was actually worried about scaring me. The fact was fairly stunning, and I just shook my head and continued to watch him, wondering just what would happen next.

**oOo**

God, she was terrified of me. It was screamingly obvious in every line of her body as she quietly finished eating the can of Campbell's soup I'd heated up.

I'd wanted to give her some space, leaving her alone to talk with Chuck while I had tried to inconspicuously lurk in the hallway after her shower. I figured that he would be easier for her to talk to than me, given how un-intimidating Chuck was out of the four of us. Besides, I was better at eavesdropping than I was at _not_  being intimidating, and the last thing I wanted was for the girl to be frightened of me. Of course, that had been thrown out the window when I'd heard her draw a shuddering breath through the thick door of the kitchen and realized that she was crying. My feet had carried me into the room before I could stop myself, my Alpha demanding I go to the Omega and...

And what? Scare the poor girl even more than she already obviously was? Shit.

I'd felt raw and exposed as she had just sat there quietly watching me. There was a shadow of fear in her eyes that was ripping my guts out, and I was praying that it wasn't that terror that made her tears stop as I wiped her cheeks dry. Obediently she had tucked back into her food when I had suggested it upon hearing her stomach grumble, not saying another word to either of us as she'd finished every drop in the bowl. I'd shared a look with Chuck in the silence, but what I had seen on his face was enough. Jesus, what the hell had I gotten myself into?

"Are you still hungry?"

She shook her head, but I didn't really believe her. The girl looked like I had pulled her out of a concentration camp, emaciated to the point where I actually couldn't really place her mixed ethnicity. Her collarbones were showing sharply through her skin at the neckline of my overly large shirt, her limbs looking spindly and twig-like where they were exposed. Her dark hair was drying, the curls hanging around her hollow cheeks and sunken stormy eyes. I was actually betting her belly button had been rubbing her backbone for a while, but I was going to let her take this at her own pace. I even tried to keep my voice measured, aware of how many times I had been accused of growling at people, not wanting to give her any more reason to be scared of me.

"Would you like to get some more rest then? Can I show you to your room?"

"My room?" An odd look passed over her face, and she cocked her head curiously at me.

Slowly I stood, breaking eye contact with her to glance at Chuck who just nodded in silent understanding. I was going to give this girl all the time, and space, she needed. It had my inner Alpha sulking away, but seeing her now I was resolved. I was not going to be another thing for her to be afraid of, not if I could help it. When I looked back the girl was pushing to her feet as well, glancing between the two of us, very well aware that we had been silently communicating as a little concerned frown creased her brow.

"It's alright Kenzie, Dean's just going to show you to room fifteen," Chuck explained to the Omega with a small smile meant to reassure her, and my Alpha raised its head for a moment to growl at him even as I kicked it back down. I needed to nip this possessiveness in the ass real quick, or it was going to get me into some serious goddamned trouble.

*

I lay awake in bed that night, unable to sleep knowing the girl was just down the hall from me.

The Alpha in me was restless and hyper-aware, snarling at the self-restraint that kept me in my bed and not pinning her to hers. It had been at least four hours since I had turned in. While normally insomnia wasn't new for me, this was. I felt like every one of my senses was straining for some sign of her, something I could identify as _hers_  and hers alone. It took everything I had not to stand outside her closed door with my ear to it like a creep just to listen to her breathing. Fuck, what the hell was _wrong_  with me?!

_Your goddamned Omega is sleeping down the hall without you, that’s what,_  my Alpha snarled.

I didn't try to shut him up because he was right, damn the son of a bitch. I resigned myself to my brain chasing itself in angry self-depreciating loops as I denied myself the one thing my instincts demanded. It wasn't just my Alpha drive to dominate the Omega either, although that was stronger than I was comfortable with. My innate overprotective impulses were in overdrive too, and every fiber in me was demanding I go to her. It was worse than when I was a kid and Sammy had been delirious with a fever one snowed in winter a million years ago. What if she needed something? What if she had a nightmare? What if she was just laying there, scared and alone in the dark? What if that terrible suppression sickness relapsed? _What if she crept out of the bunker in the dead of night and disappeared off into the darkness?_

I bunched my blanket between my fists and grit my teeth, willing myself not to get out of bed. Especially when I heard her door quietly open, my straining senses picking up the soft click of her door latch.

Don't ask me how I knew it was her, I just did. I guess living with only three other people you just get used to the way that they move; they way they do things and occupy space, hell the damned way they breathe. The moment I heard the way her door latch hesitated, the almost imperceptible swish of clothing as she moved haltingly down the hall, I knew who it was. I told myself she was just looking for the bathroom or trying to find the kitchen for a glass of water or something. I wasn't going to bother her unless it seemed like she was actually lost. She wasn't a prisoner. I wasn't her jailer. She needed to feel safe and at home here, not constantly harassed by my hovering like a freak.

There was the soft scuff of her bare foot against the stone just outside my door before her scent wafted over me. I'd left my door half-open on purpose to be able to listen more easily for her, and now I was regretting it as she passed by. I had to fight with myself not to cross the room and throw the door all the way open and drag the girl physically into bed with me. Not necessarily to fuck her, although my Alpha wanted that like a thirsty man was in want of water, but simply because my bed was where she goddamned _belonged_.

As her smell lingered my senses seemed to make it grow stronger until I was consumed with nothing but _her_. That sweet little Omega who smelled like heaven and had deep sad watery eyes that I wanted to drown in. My fingers were digging into the mattress so hard I was surprised I wasn't tearing through the memory foam as I clenched my jaw, breathing harshly through my nose as I fought with my self-control. My Alpha was raging inside me, snarling as her scent overwhelmed me, remembering the noises of pleasure she had unconsciously made while in the shower and while she had eaten. I wanted her to make those sounds while she was wrapped around me, pinned under me and plastered against me. I wanted to have her voice that totally blissed out due to my cock being buried inside her. I wanted to hear what she sounded like when I finally had her willing and wanting in my bed. Shit, she was an Omega. She was built for it.

Literally.

A gross sweat broke out over my whole body as I fought so hard against my nature at the smell encompassing me I was downright shaking from the effort. Fuck, maybe Bobby was right, maybe she did need to get locked away in the panic room until I could get some freaking _restraint_  over my god damned dick. I felt like I was losing my mind as I groaned, her scent so thick in the air I could goddamn _taste_  it.

The gentle touch to my foot through my blanket might as well have been a cattle prod up my ass.

I strangled a shout as I sat bolt upright, goggling at the tiny figure standing at the foot of my bed. Her hands jerked back to clasp to her chest as she startled, those eyes of hers wide with surprise at my reaction. The cracked door had been opened just wide enough that her slender body had been able to slip through without a sound apparently, me being none the freaking wiser to my company. It dawned on me that she had been standing there watching me when I had thought I had simply been going goddamned crazy due to her scent alone. She flushed a little and her eyes searched my face for something, fidgeting in uncertainty as she stood there in what I realized was nothing but my Led Zepplin t-shirt. It made my mouth go dry, and my blood rush... elsewhere.

"Sorry, you... it looked like you were having a nightmare."

Her whisper-soft voice spoke haltingly as my heart hammered away so loud I almost had trouble hearing her, those sharp little teeth of hers worrying nervously at her lip again. When my brain registered what she said I had to fight back a bark of humorless laughter. Nightmare? Ha. God no. If she knew the truth of what had actually just been happening to me as I had been writhing on my bed she would be well within her rights to flee like she most certainly would. I swallowed, trying to get control of myself as I dragged a hand roughly through my hair and scrubbed it over my face, trying to collect my racing thoughts.

"No, shit, I... um, I'm alright," fuck, my voice was embarrassingly rough and I cleared my throat to try and bring it back to a more normal pitch, aware of my dick throbbing in my pants, “do you need something Princess? Another blanket? Water? Are you having trouble sleeping?"

She just stood there staring at me uncertainly, chewing on her lip, watching me with those fathomless eyes of hers. When I couldn't take it anymore and my dick had died down enough I shifted, swinging my legs over the side of the bed with a deliberate slowness so that she could anticipate what I was going to do and react accordingly. I was waiting for her to show me that I had pushed this too far, for her to flinch away, but when I found myself finally standing before her in the darkness of my room I was at a loss. I brought my hand up to touch her face again, brushing my fingertips along her cheekbone like I had in the car to push some of her hair out of her face as she just _watched_  me, completely still. Half afraid she would flee like the wary animal I still associated her with, my hand moved tentatively to cup her jaw. It was only then that she moved as she tried to avert her gaze for the first time, her breath quivering out of her.

"Can I please stay in here tonight? With you? Even if it's just on the floor, I just... I..."

"Of course you can sweetheart," interrupting her hushed plea, I brushed my thumb over her lower lip to coax her to look back up at me, giving her a little smile when she met my eyes, "anything you want, you just need to ask me, ok?"

Her exhalation was a tremulous thing when she nodded hesitantly as if she wasn't sure she could really believe me, not actually saying anything further. Watching me, she waited for me to make the next move from where I was hulking over her petite form making me so very aware of how damned tiny she was. The show of trust she was displaying was making me feel like a kid making his first grown-up decision again. There was no fight to her as I took her hand and tugged her with me onto the mattress, her body pliant as I lay down and pulled her toward me. The way her body melted to fit with mine, her dark head resting on my chest as she curled into my side, was surreal. When she gave a little sigh and nuzzled into me apparently unconsciously, much like she had in her sleep when I had been carrying her earlier, my heart tripped again. I couldn't help but wonder if the thundering of my pulse was going to keep her awake.

Laying like that in the darkness for a moment, everything was quiet before she spoke in a hushed voice, " _thank you_."

I couldn't answer, my voice catching in my throat as the pitch to her voice kicked me in the nuts. Those two quiet words held more weight than they should have, and I knew she was thanking me for more than just letting her stay in my room. Pressing a kiss into her hair, I found myself with my arms curled around her, humming Deep Purple's  _Smoke on the Water_  until her breathing evened out a couple minutes later with sleep. It felt like I had passed some cosmic test as her lashes rested gently against her cheekbones and I couldn't help but feel like I had been given a gift with the easy way she drifted off in my arms. The sound of my door clicking shut made me realize that while I had been so distracted by MacKenzie coming into my room I hadn't heard Chuck get up as well, presumably when she had. The shuffle of his slippers was unmistakable as he headed back to his bed from where he had risen, obviously as worried about the girl as I was. Hopefully, the current turn of events allowed him to get more sleep, not less. I didn't think I was going to be getting any myself, too overwhelmed by the Omega in my arms and the trust she was showing in me.

**oOo**

When consciousness came to me I fought like hell against it. I was way too enraptured in the crazy dream world my damaged heat brain had conjured up to want to leave it, and I didn’t want to be forced to deal with whatever hell reality had in store for me. I was in a magical land where I was clean, safe, warm, and could smell _coffee_.

_Coffee_. Real honest to god _coffee_.

It had been over four years since I’d had coffee.

Not only coffee, in my dream there was an Alpha that had to be as hot as Bruce Wayne, who’s scent had me wanting to roll around like a cat with fresh catnip, and he was the owner of a gigantic soft bed. He came apparently complete with his own kick-ass Batmobile and Batcave too. A Batcave that had a never-ending supply of hot water and that was built like a freaking bomb shelter. Can you describe paradise in the apocalypse any better than that for an Omega? If so, please do share because I cannot.

In my dream, the dashing Alpha had saved me like some badass modern day Prince Charming, fighting off a horde of bad guys intent on harming me almost single-handed before saving me from certain death. Hell, even my _mother_  had made an appearance and given me her damned blessing before he had kicked in the door and swept in like a terrifying teddy bear. Upon sweeping me off my feet he had then carried me off to safety. Once safe he had gotten me clean with an _actual shower_ , you know, because those were still a thing, and then fed me. A _hot_  meal. Then the Alpha got even _more_  unrealistic when he had given me a room with a lock on the door and wished me a good evening without trying to do _anything_  at all to me. Not once. Not a single thing aside from a dry press of lips to my forehead before he had told me to lock the door behind him and left.

Later, when I hadn’t been able to sleep due to the fear of the grips of Morpheus, I had gone to his room for comfort and he had welcomed me with open arms and demanded _nothing_  of me in return. I was an Omega who _willingly went_  to an Alpha, but did he take advantage of that fact? No, instead the impossibly handsome man had sung me to sleep in a growling tone that had my damned toes curling while cradling me in his huge strong arms.

It was too amazing to be real.

I _really_  didn't want to actually finish waking up to shatter the remnants of my dream and deal with the truth when I opened my eyes. No way in hell. The last thing I could put any stock in remembering with any actual legitimacy was fleeing for my life at the beginning of my heat. My last true reality had been agony with my feet scraping on the cracked pavement with the very real threat of demons on my heels and my imminent demise on the horizon. Since then things were so surreal and jumbled I didn’t know what to believe or not. Most likely when I opened my eyes reality was going to be one hell of a disappointment.

The ‘shnick’ sound of a door latch being very carefully opened had me sitting upright instantly, my heart in my throat as adrenaline pumped through me and instinct had me ready to bolt. Pure panic had me freezing as Dean stepped into the room I had been apparently sleeping in. He was balancing a tray slightly precariously on one huge hand and quietly pulling the door shut behind him as if he was worried about making too much noise. I just sat there and held my breath, my pulse thundering away when I realized the man was actually real. My body flushed with things I couldn’t name as my unhinged jaw clicked shut, the adrenaline instantly draining from me when I finally registered that I _hadn’t_  been dreaming.

The big Alpha was _real_  and he was standing right _t_ _here_. He was wearing what looked to be a soft blue flannel over a black tee-shirt and worn in blue jeans. The outfit was simple, but it was obvious by his sleep-mussed hair and bare feet that he hadn’t bothered to look in a mirror. When he glanced over to the bed and his olive eyes met mine I felt like I could finally breathe again. The expression on his face was nothing short of adorable. He froze like a deer in headlights by the door, the tray still in his hands, and was so unbelievably awkward I didn’t know what to do as I blinked at him.

For a long moment, we just stared at each other before he seemed to collect himself, holding up the tray as if he was offering it to me.

"I, um, I brought you, uh, some breakfast? It's not much, and I, uh, burnt the eggs a little bit, but they're fresh. Yesterday was supposed to be a supply run but then with all the… and we…,” he rambled for a moment in that rough voice that did nothing to hide his apparent nerves, pausing to clear his throat for a moment before continuing, “Sorry that we don't have anything other than sugar for the coffee, but I figure enough sugar can make even the crappiest cop coffee taste decent enough to drink so…,” with that he abruptly moved forward, crossing the room with just a couple long strides to sit heavily on the edge of his bed by my feet.

I couldn't seem to do more than just blink at him as he fussed agitatedly for a bit, trying to figure out what to do with the tray before I just held out my hands for it. Pushing it forward he then hesitated to let it go, his eyes searching my face for something before he flushed and averted his gaze. I was a little surprised to realize he was embarrassed.

"Sorry I burned the eggs," he mumbled, "I would have made more but the hens are being stingy."

I took that second to actually look at what he had brought me and felt myself choke up a little for reasons too big for me to try and deal with right then. There was a bunch of cherry tomatoes beside three singed, and subsequently overcooked, fried eggs and a bowl of what looked like instant oatmeal in plain white stoneware. Next to them was a steaming cup of coffee.

Sitting innocently off to the side of it all next to the fork that was carefully placed on a folded napkin was an innocent little sprig of bright yellow wild mustard. It was a little thing of beauty that had no right to be there and yet was perfectly in its place at that moment.

I felt tears prickling my eyes as I reached out a trembling hand to brush my fingertips over the little clustered flowers just to really prove to myself that they were real. With that I turned my attention to the tomatoes, hesitating only a moment before I plucked one of the bright red fruits off the stem. I couldn’t help marveling in the sun warmed tautness of the red-skinned flesh as I held it up as if it was a precious gem. The heavenly fresh smell of the tomato filled my nose and caused my mouth to water with the promise of the flavor. When the morning-warm sweet seeds burst forward, causing me to start once I popped it in my mouth and bit down, tears abruptly fell heavily from my eyes and onto my lap from the action. Even as I began crying I started laughing because I didn't know what else to do as I picked up the fork and dug into the food with gusto.

Those singed eggs were gourmet in my book.

"I can't believe you made me breakfast,” I laughed through my tears after I swallowed, reaching for the coffee as I beamed the big Alpha a smile, “ _Thank you_.”

Dean was looking at me with an expression that was a mix of gratified and regretful that made me pause when I met his eyes. My laughter died on my lips as he brought his hand up to gently wipe at my wet cheeks like he had the day before. The contact ignited a glowing warmth in my stomach that was connected to the point where his callous roughened skin was touching mine, and I was shocked to realize it wasn’t just arousal but _contentment_. At that moment for the first time in forever, I felt something close to actual _joy_. Closing my eyes against the onslaught I pushed my cheek into his palm before I looked at him again, trying to tell him something I had no words for. As he cradled my cheek him his huge warm paw I just let myself relax, my Omega outright purring at the sensations the contact was evoking. It was a moment before he cleared his throat and shifted, something flashing through his green gaze as he carded his fingers gently through my hair. I almost never wanted the moment to end even as he motioned for me to continue eating.

A little while later that I was still sitting in his bed, the now very empty tray off to the side as I nursed the candy sweet coffee he had refilled halfway through my meal. We were watching each other quietly as I cradled the warm ironstone in my fingers, taking small sips of the sweetly bitter brown liquid as I studied him. Sometime after he had come back from the coffee run his big hand had come to rest on my foot over the cover of the blanket. I could feel his thumb rhythmically stroking my ankle bone through the fabric, although I suspected he was actually touching me unconsciously. He was… unreal was the only word I could truly think of to properly describe him. The huge Alpha looked like an adonis made for a marble statue or something, but he was so damned _sweet_  I was going to get a cavity from him and not the coffee he liberally dosed with sugar. Every time I looked at him I got the impression of a big kid, unsure of if they had done the right thing or not.

I wasn’t sure what the hell to do with _that_. How in the hell could this guy even be real? Sure Alphas like him had existed before the end of the world, but even then a decent Alpha who wasn’t a complete jackass had been rare. Now though unmated Alphas were feral and dangerous and couldn’t be trusted at _all_  because they were so easily possessed. Mated Alphas who could resist possession had ceased to be a thing after they had all been killed off trying to protect their Omegas in the first few years after the end of the world started, just like my parents. An Alpha in this world now was nothing but dangerous. Not Dean though. For some reason, everything about this Alpha projected safety to me. The whole situation had me feeling more than slightly adrift on a very vast ocean in a very rickety boat. While it was true that the ocean I seemed to be floating on was made of rainbows and warm sunshine and good things, I was still frightened by the fact that I had no idea where this seemed to be going. For the first time in my life my Omega was truly acting out of my control as I felt her pull towards the Alpha before me, and that should have frightened me except for the fact that the Alpha had yet to actually give me a reason to fear him in any way. Hell, just the opposite really which was confounding me. 

I mean, how the hell could a guy like him even _exist_  anymore?

“Is there anything else I can get you, princess?” His impossibly growling voice finally broke the silence, and it sent a shudder through me so intense I felt goose pimples break out over my thighs and arms and my inner Omega rolled over to bare her damned belly in blissful submission.

“What _are_  you?” I heard myself blurt out, which caused him to start a little, sitting up a bit straighter as confusion crossed his face.

I flushed and looked away from him, hiding behind the coffee cup as I felt my embarrassment make my cheeks glow.

“I mean, it’s the _apocalypse_  and,” I licked my lips, stalling as I tried to come up with the right words to convey everything that was going through my mind, “you… you’re an _Alpha_ , and _I’m..._  and you're not…” boldness overcame me and I looked the big Alpha directly in the eye, “ _why_  are you being so nice to me? Why are you _helping_  me? You haven’t even…”

I didn’t mean for it to come out as an accusation, but that was exactly how it sounded. I expected him to pull away from me then, but instead, his hand tensed against my leg and he almost looked pained. He reached up and took the coffee cup gently out of my hands and set it on the tray, exchanging it for the small sprig of wildflowers, before he took my fingers in his own. His work-worn hands were sure and strong as he touched me, but the calloused fingertips were gentle as he tucked the bright mustard blossoms behind my ear. Cupping my chin in his hand, he brushed his thumb over my lower lip again for a moment and looked meaningfully at me.

“I’m going to take care of you Kenzie. I _promise_  you’re safe now,” his words made my whole body tingle, and I wanted nothing more than to curl up in his lap so he could pet me as he spoke, “you don’t need to be scared anymore.”


	4. Aphrodisiac thy name be Cherry Pie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the first encounter after the first few weeks pass with MacKenzie and Dean and they slowly get to know each other. 
> 
> He's trying so hard to be respectful and give her space as she adjusts to no longer having to live a life of constant terror.
> 
> And then she makes a pie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Drug use. Pie. Smut. ALL THE FLUFF. Not kidding about writing this stuff instead of sleeping. Shorter (?) chapter
> 
> Prepare yourselves.
> 
> Oh dear sweet mother of god... yeah... this chapter was annoying to write, and as I read it, it will get a re-write. A pretty huge one. But the plot ponders on, so I'll deal with it later. After I get some more sleep.
> 
> And now it's been re-written. I feel better. Still no sleep though, lol.

The first week into this new life had consisted of her mostly just sleeping, eating whatever I put in front of her, and showering.

I didn’t mind taking care of her; she was recovering, obviously, and she really was enjoying the access to hot water.  The first few days she was a ghost when she moved throughout the bunker, still ducking her head and hiding shyly behind corners when we were around, keeping herself as invisible as possible when she moved cautiously between the bedroom and the kitchen and the bathroom.  At least she was giving out small smiles when any of us made eye contact with her even on that first day.  

Nightmares plagued her, every single night.  It almost felt like every single hour in the beginning.  The first few times she had woken up and been unable to go back to sleep, she hadn’t wanted to talk as she had lay there silent and unmoving, but on the third night she had finally opened up.

It had been a surprise when she had spoken quietly while curled in my arms with her back to my chest, still wearing one of my old t-shirts, my hand stroking her arm to sooth her as she trembled.

“Dean?” her voice had been the barest whisper, as if she was worried she was gonna wake me up. 

I pressed a kiss to her shoulder, followed with an embarrassingly throaty, “Yeah?”

She turned in my arms, her cheek resting on my forearm as she put a little distance between us so that she could easily see my face.  She had her teeth sunk into her lower lip as she looked up at me with those damned eyes.  Ugh, I had though Sam could give me the eyes.  This woman… I hoped she never learned just how much they undid me.  I reached out and gently brushed her wild mane off her forehead as she watched me, waiting for her to speak, not wanting to push her.  Time was what she needed to adjust, and time was what I was willing to give her, no matter what my instincts said.  I was not going to be that asshole.  Not to her.

Her eyes dropped to my throat, and I licked my lips when I felt her fingertips gently brush my collar bone, almost like she felt as if she wasn’t allowed to touch me.  When her eyes came back to my face I don’t know what she saw there, but I hoped it wasn’t my raging libido.

“Can you… can you talk to me?” her voice had a tremble to it, dispelling my concern at her innocent yet pleading tone. “Please?”

“Of course Sweetheart,” I answered immediately, petting her crazy hair that I secretly loved. “Got anything you want to talk about?”

“Umm… I’m willing to argue the pros and cons of Zep vs. Floyd?”

I laughed and kissed her forehead.

It was those late night conversations that I learned about her life.  She told me all about her parents, and the goals she’d had before it had just been a daily struggle to survive.  In return I told her about Sam and growing up on the road.  It was all fluff stuff, nothing too deep, almost the kind of conversations you had getting to know someone over coffee.  It was… comfortable.

The night she had woken up crying, she had stared at the ceiling and described to me in graphic detail the night her parents had been killed.  When she had described the skinhead in charge of the rest of the hoard, making my blood turn to ice even as my inner Alpha had howled in rage, I hadn’t been able to control my growl.

Fear that I would scare her wasn’t enough to keep me from promising, “I’ll kill him.”

When I saw her puzzled face I realized, she had no idea.  No idea at all to the actual circumstances I had found her under.

“He was there,” I explained as I propped myself up in the dark so I could look down at her face.  Her eyes shined, and I could see the tear tracks leaking from the corners from the story of her parents, even as she looked at me in confusion.  “When I found you.  He was there, outside the trailer.  A whole bunch of them, like something out of a friggin’ monster movie.”

Her eyes widened even as her face blanched, and her mouth formed a little “o” of surprise before she blinked and swallowed, her voice tiny, “I… I thought I had hallucinated that.”

I reached for her cheek in the darkness, warmth spreading through me when her eyes fluttered closed and her lips parted with a little sigh, instinctively nuzzling into my paw of a hand.  When she opened her eyes again they were dark and fathomless, and the Alpha in me wanted her.

“I will never let him hurt you, Kenz.” I promised instead.

She’d smiled beautifully, fresh tears falling, and had kissed my palm.  Ignoring my erection I had then proceeded to open up a little more to her then, figuring turnabout was fair play, and told her about how I had lost mom.  When she had reached out to snuggle into me I had taken comfort in her soft arms, and made sure to keep my hands in safe zones.

*

It was really getting hard for me to keep my hands to myself.

I was ashamed to admit it, because who really wants to admit that they lack self control, but god _damned_  it was getting hard.

The woman baked me a pie.  An actual _pie_.  With a crust and a tangy sweet filling and everything.  The smell was everything I remembered and then some.  I mean, I know she had _told_  me that her family owned a bakery and she had gone to culinary school, but I guess it never really… computed.  Then, judging but the damned smell, Castiel must have gotten her fucking _stoned_  and then…

Pie.

I looked at it in disbelief as it sat cooling on the table like it had the right to be there or something.  As if it wasn’t a figment of my imagination sitting there, with it’s too red filling and too prettily patterned golden crust, just taunting me.  As if the end of the world hadn’t happened and delicious foods like pie hadn’t stopped existing.  The kitchen was an absolute nightmare, and it was obvious that the pantry stores had been raided as well, however there seemed to be something to be said for the outcome of the madness.

I heard a giggle from the library, Bobby following me when I dropped the bag in my hand, and went to see just what was going on.

It had been a couple of weeks since Kenz had come into my life, but the changes in her were pretty major.  After the first week she had started putting on weight and was spending time outside of my room, which made me happy because she stopped hiding and seemed to be at ease now.  The Bunker was her home, and if she felt comfortable enough to do drugs with an angel and destroy the kitchen, I was all for it.

She was sprawled across one of the leather arm chairs, gripping her sides at something that Castiel had obviously read in a book that probably wasn’t nearly as funny as she thought it was.  Another one of my t-shirts was draped over her small frame, although from the look of it, that was _all_  she was wearing.  My mind blanked for a moment, just taking in the shirt, and her skin, and the smell of pie mixing with the smell of _her_ , and the fine dusting of flour in her hair…

“Oh, hello Dean.” Castiel said as he looked at me upside-down. 

“Cas. I take it you guys are… enjoying yourselves?” I said, my tone as unamused as I could make it, even as I tried to gather my wits.

“God damnit man, the whole place reeks.” Bobby complained behind me.

“God is dead,” Kenzie giggled, toppling to the floor, her long legs kicking helplessly against the floor in her giggles.  She looked up at me as I couldn’t help but smirk down at her being just so ridiculous.  She suddenly frowned, pouting as she pointed an accusing finger at me.  “You have been gone aaaallll day.  I was bored,”  Her face split in a grin again, “but then Cas had a great idea, and I found the pantry.  You didn’t tell me you had a fully stocked pantry.”

I reached down and pulled her to her feet by the extended limb, and she stumbled into me, off balance.

“And so Cas’s great idea was to get totally baked, and then that gave you the right to destroy the kitchen?” I asked as my arms encircled her to hold her steady.

“Don’t be like that Dean,” Castiel said in a bit of a sulk, now that he realized his smoking party was most likely done. “She baked you a pie.”

Kenzie scrunched her face, and it was so freaking cute I had no defense against it as she looked up at me from where she was buried in my chest.  She squinted and her voice was accusing,  “Yeah… I baked you a pie. Cas said you like pie.”

“I do,” I confirmed, smiling as she giggled again, “And you are REALLY stoned.”

She hummed in agreement, nuzzling into me.  Her response was suddenly very sleepy, “Feels nice. Dad and I used to get totally ripped together.” She giggled. "Best thing for a heat, you know."

"She's correct." Cas affirmed with a very decisive nod, even as she nodded off against my chest.  

“Ok princess, bed time for you.” I scooped her up even as Cas objected to losing his smoking buddy.  I just gave him a look as she waggled her fingers at him, giggling again before sighing contentedly as she rested against me.

*

As I lay her down on our bed her fingers stayed tangled in my shirt, and she looked up at me suddenly worried, biting her lip.  “You… you do like pie, right?”

I couldn’t help it, that innocent uncertainty, and I groaned and grabbed her face with both hands, really kissing her for the first time.

She fucking _melted_  under me, instantly soft and pliant, the softest little moan escaping her as she clutched my shirt.  She submitted in a way that made my brain short circuit, and I all but tore myself way from her before I lost my shit, breathing hard as I rested my forehead against hers.  My hands were tangled in her wild hair and her eyes were dark and dazed, her mouth swollen from my ferocity, looking both startled and debauched, and it made me ache.

I had to stop, she was stoned and I couldn’t take advantage of that.  But boy howdy, did I want to.

“Baby,” I growled, my nose touching hers. “I LOVE pie.”

I pulled myself away from her and moved to the door before I did something that I would regret, leaving her in a slightly startled, panting heap.  I adjusted myself in my jeans, knowing that bastard wasn’t going to calm down any time soon, before looking back at her as she lay sprawled against my blankets.  She had no right to look that good, wearing nothing but my oversized AC/DC shirt, her little finger pressed against that bottom lip she had been worrying with those little teeth, her eyes dark.  I had to swallow, my hand gripping the door frame to keep me from going back to that bed.

“Get some sleep Princess,” and with that I left her on the bed.

Man, I was gonna need a cold shower.

But first, pie.

*

The guys were all seated around the table with plates and forks out, thankfully waiting for me so I didn’t have to murder them, looking at the pie in question like it was the nectar of the gods.  As far as I was concerned, the damned thing was.  Honestly, I had never thought I was going to get to have pie again.  At this point it didn’t even matter if it was the worst pie in the world, it was still god damned pie.

Chuck divided it up.  I had known that we’d had a couple of jars of some kind of fruit preserve in the pantry, and I had looked at the unlabeled jars longingly a couple of times, tempted to just eat them, but always I had refrained.  Our pantry had been full of stuff, but most of the sealed containers hadn’t been labeled. The idea of trying to identify the contents of the pantry had been daunting, and none of us were honestly good at anything but the basics to survive anyway, so we never bothered.  Things like bread were long gone, and only in my wildest dreams had I dared to even dream of an actual pie, but then, there it was.

Cherry Pie straight out of the oven.  She’d even done a fancy lattice work crust, something she told me she'd perfected as a child.  Apparently even stoned out of her mind she didn’t like to do things half assed.  The thing was almost too pretty to cut… almost.

We were almost reverent as the individual pieces were placed before each of us after the thing had been divided into sixths.  Then we all took our bites in unison, and at the same time we all let out a noise that I honestly not only hoped to never make in their presence again, but also never wanted to hear from any of them ever again.  It was sweet and tart and…

My eyes actually welled up with tears.  Fuck, that was damned good pie.

It was telling that no one spoke until we were finished, the last two pieces of the thing were then in imminent danger from the four of us as we all cleaned the remnants off our plates.  No one stopped me when I pulled the pan towards myself, although they were all looking at it like they wanted to pounce on it. There was a lot of willpower on my part to put my empty plate over the top of the divine cherry creation I had been lucky enough to sample.  It blocked it from view, saving the last two pieces, because I believed in out of sight, out of mind.  We all sat back at that point, Bobby patting his stomach in a satisfied manner, Chuck grinning, Cas looking both pleased and contemplative.

“Man, that was…” Chuck drifted off with a chuckle, shaking his head in amazement as he dabbed his finger in a bit of the pie filling left on his plate, licking it off. “I don’t think I’ve ever had a better piece of pie.”

“She is a very talented Chef.” Cas murmured, his eyes still on the covered pan. I was going to have to watch him, to make sure his munchies didn’t kill the pie she hadn’t even gotten to try yet. It had probably been a while since she’d had anything of the sort either.

“You can say that again.” Bobby laughed, his face content for the first time in ages as he grinning, shaking his head as well. “Damn boy, you certainly got lucky with this one.  I thought pie had gone the way of the dodo.”

I chuckled in agreement, kinda speechless at the moment Kenz had been able to give the four of us with her amazing pie.  We hadn’t had a moment of honest, not violence induced, peace and happiness in longer than I cared to remember.

Before Lucifer had taken Sam.

I pushed to my feet to dispel the thought and looked around the kitchen with a sigh, because it truly was a disaster, but then got moving.  For what she had given us the woman didn’t deserve to have dish duty, like, ever again.

My erection had dissipated long before we were done cleaning up her mess.  The guys eagerly pitching in to help clean, meaning we had the place spotless in no time.  Considering what she had told me, and the amazing creation she had whipped up out of nowhere, I was ok with having permanent dish duty if she wanted to take over in the kitchen.  Hell, if she cooked like that she never had to lift a finger she didn’t want to ever again.

We went our separate ways when we were done, Bobby and Chuck planning on doing some reloads while Cas was going to go and attend to his garden, which meant he was probably going to keep smoking and communing with whatever insect was the flavor of the week.  I looked over the kitchen to make sure everything was put away, glancing at the pie sitting in the middle of the table again with the plate protecting it, just… waiting. Taunting me…

No.  Shower.

She deserved to have the last couple pieces of her pie.

*

When I moved down to the tiled room, I had to stop when I glanced over the shower I had first put her in.  Just the memory of the noise she’d made when she’s stepped into the spray of hot water for the first time had me instantly hard again.  It had been downright obscene, and with the remnants of her heat in the air it had been a close thing with my control.  I wanted her to make that sound while she was wrapped around me, to have her voice that totally blissed out.  Shit, she was an Omega. She was built for it.

Literally.

The thought had me ready to go all over again, throbbing because it was so easy to picture her naked in that stall and I groaned.  I had a choice, to either step into a cold shower and hope that my dick calmed the hell down, which was unlikely, or skip the torture and just take myself in hand… again.  I licked my lips, and my tongue caught the faint flavor of cherry.

Oh yeah, a cold shower wasn’t going to do a damned thing.

I turned on the hot water and waited a moment before I stepped into the spray in the stall that contained my wash stuff, grabbing the soap as I slicked myself up.  I leaned my arm against the far wall as I took my dick in hand, the hot water pouring down my back, giving it a stroke that had me hissing out my breath from sensitivity.  This wasn’t going to take me long at all to get rid of, the girl had me so worked up.  The things I wanted to do to her…

The sooner the better so I could get on with my shower, and my night, of sleeping next to her soft, trusting form.

Closing my eyes as my hand worked over my tumescent flesh, and I didn’t even have to think about it.  Images of her just came unbidden to my mind; her skin, her smell, the swell of her breasts under the fabric of _my_  shirt, the peak of her nipples when they pebbled… the occasional flash of the lower curve of her ass cheek when she was reaching for something on the days that she decided to forego my huge gym shorts.  How easy it would be to just roll that trusting form underneath me.  Just the memory of her scent from her heat…

In just a couple of weeks I had a million images to choose from that had me groaning and grunting as my hand tugged my cock, wishing like hell I was looking down into those eyes of hers as those full lips were wrapped around me.  The perverse part of me knew that I would never get sick of watching my cock disappear into that mouth so long as those big, dark, doe eyes of hers were gazing up at me.  Just the thought had me groaning and my dick spitting.  She honestly had the most amazing pair of blow job eyes I’d ever seen.

Fuck I was close.

I will never admit that I screamed when a hand suddenly touched my back.  I let out a yell; a manly, gruff yell that any lumberjack would be proud of.  A Winchester doesn’t _scream_.

Spinning around I almost fell on my ass in shock, because the object of my little day dream was standing there, still wearing my shirt as she stood in the hot shower spray.  The water was soaking the material, making it hug her in a fashion that was almost lewd, and highlighting every enticing detail of her form.  Her dark hair was quickly being soaked, hanging around her concerned face as she was reaching out for me, her mouth open as if she had been about to speak.

Then her eyes darted down as my cock jumped at the sight of her.

Her face flushed and she froze completely, her eyes wide at the sight of my raging cock, her reddened lips unconsciously being wetted by her pink tongue as she stared.    
Neither of us moved for a second before I suddenly dropped my hands to cover myself with a startled, “ _HEY!_ ”

My exclamation seemed to snap her out of it, for her hand pulled back to her chest uncertainly, and she suddenly straightened.  Her flushed face met mine, and she looked slightly breathless as she blinked water out of her eyes, seemingly rooted to the spot.

“I’m sorry, you were groaning and it sound like you were in pain…” her voice was breathy, eyes darted back to my covered erection, and her flush intensified.  My dick twitched when she licked her lips again, then she looked back up at me.

Her pupils were dominating the grey of her eyes.

Without too much more forethought my hands gave up covering my modesty and I groaned, reaching out for her.  When my hand grasped her arm I pivoted, turning us so her back hit the wall, the water sluicing down my back, caging her smaller form.  My body was plastered against hers, my lips on her throat, trailing up to that mouth of hers even as my right hand dropped to her hip to pin her to the wall, my leg sliding between her thighs.  My other hand pinned her tiny wrist effortlessly to the wall even as the fingers of her free hand gripped my shoulder.  She was gasping into my mouth as I rolled my hips into her, realizing then that she was absolutely wearing  _nothing_  but my shirt.  Her body was more responsive than I could have dreamed, even as the wet fabric outlining ever contour of her breasts and they rubbed against my chest, her nipples peaking against my skin.

She made the most amazing noises.

“Fuck I want you so bad MacKenzie.” I groaned as I buried my face into her neck again as I felt her bare cunt against my wet thigh.  I almost lost my mind when I felt the warmth of her slick suddenly against my skin when she responded to my statement.

“Were you… were you just thinking about me?” She gasped, her voice a breathy thing that shredded my control.

She pulled back and looked at me, and I couldn’t lie to her.

My voice escaped me for a moment, so I just nodded.  Then I couldn’t take it anymore and I plundered her mouth again, without mercy, groaning when her tongue danced hesitantly with mine.  Her naïvety was spelled out with every bit of her hesitation as she kissed me back, her hand seemly afraid to venture from my shoulder even as her trapped hand kept closing into an involuntary fist.  Her hips were dancing along my thigh though as I ground into her, and it seemed as if it took every bit of her willpower to pull her mouth away from mine.

“What,” she was completely breathless when she finally asked, and I loved it.  I could smell her slick over the shower. “what was I doing?”

I groaned and buried my face in her neck again as I remembered envisioning her on her knees with my cock in her mouth, and I dragged my lips up the soft, fragrant skin of her neck before telling her, in detail, _exactly_  what I had been thinking about.  The way her mouth had been wrapped around me, the way she had been watching me, just how _hot_  I thought it would be to see that sight.

She shuddered against me, and when I felt another rush of wet heat against my leg I was pretty sure I was going to lose it.

Suddenly she was pushing me away a little, and for a moment I was afraid I had pushed her too far.  I opened my mouth to start apologizing, mortified, but stopped when I saw her face.  Her cheeks were flushed, and her skin almost glowing, while her eyes were dark but shining as her breath escaped in little pants around kiss reddened lips.  She looked like sin wrapped in my shirt, and then she sunk to her knees.

My mind blanked even as she self consciously tucked some hair behind her ear, the flush on her cheeks as much from embarrassment as arousal.  Her hand shook slightly as she reached for me, and I gasped, trying not to thrust my hips as her hot little hand finally touched me.  She looked up at me for approval, her dark gaze unsure and questioning, and I had to bite back a groan and try to not cum right then.

“Is this… ok?” she asked as she gave a few experimental tugs,  her hand almost not able to fully wrap around me, which should not have been as arousing as it was.

“Can you…” seeing her looking up at me like that, my little fantasy come to life, fuck, I couldn’t help myself, “Can you use your mouth? Please princess?”

I was begging, but I didn’t care.  The shower had long washed off the soap from my dick, but pre-cum still dribbled from my glans like trails of drool.

She looked startled for a moment, but then her gaze switched to the cock in front of her face.  Determination then crossed her face, and I groaned as she licked her lips, that becoming flush on her cheekbones, and I almost whited out when that tongue touched my head experimentally for the first time.  It had been so long I couldn’t help my reaction as my hand was suddenly buried in her wet hair, my hips thrusting forward to push against her lips as I grunted.  She looked a little startled for a moment, frowning a little at my penis as she pulled back, like she was making her mind up about it.  My hips thrust forward again in her grip when I realized she was rolling her tongue around in her mouth, _fucking tasting me_ , deciding if she was going to give me the chance to defile her.

Her hand tightened its grip around the base of me, and my eyes rolled back in my head as her mouth closed over me and she fucking _moaned_.

Years of being a man whore was the only thing that saved me from embarrassing myself right then and there.  It was hot and wet, and what she lacked in experience she was apparently willing to make up for with enthusiasm as she stretched her jaw around me.  When I looked down and saw her face, her eyes were gazing up at me as if she was waiting for my approval or something, and it caused my hips to slam forward, and she choked for a moment before she pulled back to recover, before going right back down with an audible slurp.

Fuck, she was the hottest thing I’d ever seen as she knelt on the tile, my wet shirt clinging to her as my hand was buried in her hair.  Her small hand wrapped around me as she looked up at me with those god damned eyes, her other hand braced against my hip to steady herself.  She was the picture of defiled innocence as she fulfilled a fantasy that had been plaguing me since I’d first seen her.

My Omega had her lips wrapped around my cock.  As she gazed up at me, obvious arousal on her face, she hollowed her cheeks with another moan.

My Alpha howled in triumph.

I pulled out of her mouth with a sudden pop and a curse as I felt my orgasm slam into me.  My hand still wrapped in her wet hair and pulled her head back, so she was forced to look up at me even as my cum striped her throat and chest, white against the blackened fabric of my shirt.  I hadn’t been willing to spoil the experience by soiling her mouth yet, although it had been a close thing.

She was panting, everything about her dark expression was obscene enough that my spent dick twitched with renewed interest, and then she licked her swollen, reddened lips uncertainly.

“Was that… ok?”

I was shaking from my orgasm, so I laughed.  Shaking my head I dragged her up until I could crush her swollen lips beneath my own.

“Princess, that was more than Ok.” I growled into her mouth, panting still from my release.

I reached behind her and shut off the water before maneuvering her out of her shower stall.  I couldn’t keep my hands or my lips off her, even as I struggled with the wet material of my shirt.  It landed with a satisfying wet plop when I finally got it off of her, and my hands were suddenly full of her hot, wet flesh.  She let out a squeal when I didn’t even reach for a towel, instead scooping her over my shoulder as I trotted briskly down the hall to my room, my hand firmly planted on her ass.  She squirmed, but she was laughing, nothing but delight in her tone.

“Baby, I hope you’re ready, because we’re just getting started.” I promised as I closed the door to my room behind us.

 

  
**********************

 

  
“You idjit! Why the hell did you get water all over the damned floor?!”

In a flash Dean had jerked his blanket up and over me, to cover the fact that I had just been straddling his lap with my head thrown back and my hands fisted in my wet hair as I sank down on him, adjusting to his girth.  I felt my face heat up even as I was suddenly huddled against his chest, cowering under the blanket as I peeked out at Bobby Singer’s shocked, and honestly adorably embarrassed, face.  He turned redder than his beard, stuttering and beating a hasty retreated even as Dean had bellowed,

“Get the hell **_OUT_** , man!”

The door slammed shut and Dean’s head fell heavily back onto his pillow, his hand over his eyes even as he clenched his jaw and swallowed, breathing in a very measured cadence through his nose.  He didn’t move as I peered up at him, his body incredibly still even as _his cock was still buried inside me_.

It had been over five years since I’d let someone touch me, and it had only been the once.  I had forgotten how great sex could feel.

I think he was afraid that the intrusion had ruined the mood or something, but honestly I was simply trying to not burst out laughing, because Bobby’s face had been _priceless_.  Unable to help myself I buried my face in his broad, deliciously naked chest, and snorted as I tried to stifle the laughter that wanted to bubble out of me, because there was a chance that it might legitimately ruin the mood.  I was just too happy though, and so I started trembling with barely controlled mirth.

The movement caused my muscles to tighten, which had the big body underneath me suddenly react as I milked him, his breath leaving him as if he’s been punched. When his hips jerked involuntarily at that, I moved back against him, because fuck he felt amazing.  His hand tightened on my shoulder, and then I felt his other hand pushing my hair away from my face and I looked up at him, biting my lip to try and not just break down laughing.

He narrowed his eyes at me, rolling his hips, “What’s so funny?”

I snorted again, shaking my head and buried my face into his chest as my shoulders shook from the absurdity of everything.  A few weeks ago I had been cowering in a trailer waiting to die, convinced that there were no good people left in the world.  Now I was literally stretched around an Alphas cock of my own volition, safe and fed and sleeping like a human again. My, how shit can change. I couldn't help but laugh.

He growled, but unlike before the tone was playful, and his huge hands held me firmly as he rolled us, pushing me into the mattress as his lips were suddenly all over my neck again, and for a moment they rested over _that_  spot, making my toes curl.  His weight pushed down on me, and I reveled in his strength and slightly overwhelming size, my inner Omega causing me to become pliant and submissive under him.  He felt it, and his teeth sunk into that plump lower lip of his as his gaze suddenly darkened with lust as his Alpha responded.  He reared up, shifting so one of my thighs was trapped between his, my free leg held tight against his chest as he rolled his hips into me again.

The gasp that escaped me was completely out of my control as my head pressed into the pillow and my back arched against him, because _fuck_  his cock was just _so_  deep I didn’t even know what to do with myself. He had my fingers scrabbling for purchase against the muscles of his thighs because I didn’t know what else to do with my hands.

When I glanced back at Dean he was looking down at me, one big hand all but encircling my leg, the other gripping my hip to pull me firmly into him.  He looked like a primeval god, powerful and in complete control as he rolled into me, his eyes piercing as he watched my reactions, his hair a wet spiky mess from the shower.  It was a bit of sensory overload that had my eyes roll back in my head.  He just _kept on_  hitting that spot that just had me moaning and whispering obscenities and gasping out for more all at once.  I came, and honestly, I couldn’t tell you when I really stopped, because he was _merciless_.  The sounds of his dick moving in and out of me was fucking wet and downright _obscene_ since we’d started.

“Fuck, baby,” his voice was low, and made my body clench in helpless arousal, which earned a deep groan from him, “You feel _incredible_.  So tight, so wet…”

“Dean, _please_ ,” I begged shamelessly, not even knowing what I was begging for at this point, but there was something I needed, something more.

Something I instinctually knew he could give me.

He slowed his movements and I keened even as he grinned, holding me tight to him, knowing he had full control over the situation.  I shouldn’t have found that thought so arousing, but my body tensed and writhed under him in pure need at his dominance.  His nostrils flared as that grin never left his face, those green eyes of his crinkling at the corner.  The face I must have made at him as I looked over my shoulder with my teeth digging into my lower lip apparently did it for him, because his gaze darkened and his grin turned almost feral.

Suddenly that big dick was pistoning out of me like a jackhammer, and it felt so good I couldn’t even breathe properly as my fists bunched in his sheets.  He bent forwards, a lifetime of dance making the position for me easy, and suddenly he was sucking on the side of my neck, HARD.

I clenched around him with a scream, my hands burying themselves in his hair as I held him there, his mouth where my instinct craved it. Fuck, I didn’t even know I could cum like that, but _damn_.

Dean roared against my neck, and I could feel him pulse deep inside me.

Every ounce of tension drained from me, and my eyes rolled back in my head.


	5. Supply runs and skin heads

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joy, loss and self loathing. Kinda in a nutshell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are about to get a bit (potentially a lot) more dramatic. Hopefully this story comes across as well on here as it plays in my head, because the plot has taken on a mind of its own and things are about to get a little more nuts. If the threat of violent rape (nothing happens) bothers you, this is your warning for this chapter. 
> 
> Also, if you've actually made it this far and are enjoying yourself as you read, thank you. Sorry for the spelling mistakes and grammatical errors, I do work on this when I can't sleep and then post it, sometimes horribly unedited. I fix things when I catch them on re-reads!

 

“Do you practice that pout in the mirror, Winchester?”

I clenched my jaw and turned to look at my passenger in the Impala with narrowed eyes before turning my attention back to the pavement in front of us.  It did nothing to dampen the cheeky grin on her face, because she knew she was being proven right as we cruised down the cracked roadway.  We were weaving through abandoned cars with a familiarity that made the whole thing casual by now.

My eyes couldn't help but drift over to just drink her in again though. Her dark, unruly, hair was pulled into a messy bun to keep it out of her face, which had lost any semblance of the gauntness that it once had.  Muscles and curves now gave her a healthy physique that was no longer bordering on underweight, thank god.  Even her skin had taken on a healthy golden glow.  Her eyes were bright and no longer shadowed with fear, and when she laughed they fucking sparkled.  She was curled there like she belonged in the passenger seat, her feet curled under her as she leaned against the door, her laughing eyes on me as she teased.  Kenz in the passenger seat of Baby was now as comfortable and familiar as Sammy.

Now she was officially part of the furniture.  

It had been almost two months since I had found her, and she had blossomed into her own person fitting solidly into our weird little family.  Meeting the real her made me wish I could have known her earlier in life, made me wish I could introduce her to my parents and all that crazy shit, because she was amazing.  While we hadn’t made it official, we were a permanent item in my mind.  In just a couple short months I couldn’t imagine waking up without my nose being tormented by her crazy curls ever again.  She didn’t know it, but I liked to hide her hair ties when we were in the bunker so she would have to wear the crazy mass down.

It always amazed me that she didn’t believe how sexy her wild hair was to me, but damn, the girl ALWAYS had bed head.  It was fucking hot.

She'd made the Bunker home. Now she spent her days mostly gardening with Cas, making elaborate plans for the area surrounding the bunker to implement in the coming months.  Sketches of complex watering systems and gardening plots dominated one of the tables in the library like the master plan of a mad scientist, and I knew the word 'hydroponics' had been floated around more than once.  Somewhere she’d found some old famers almanacs that she wanted to study, like the adorable nerd she was, trying to figure out a plan for an outdoor grow area in a Kansas winter, which I thought was crazy.  I wasn’t sure she was actually kidding when she said she wanted to get animals in the future, but not like, a dog.

She wanted a cow.  Jersey, if we could find one specifically.

Basics for cooking she claimed.  The woman was a powerhouse of ideas, and apparently now that she wasn't running for her life nor living in constant terror, she was a force of nature.  Not one to sit idyl, she already knew most of the area around the bunker, initially clomping around in clothing she had borrowed from Chuck that had still been swimmingly huge on her, scouting out everything of note in the area she could think of.  Basics for settled survival she claimed.  No one could live off of expiring canned food forever she'd said when she'd brought back wild foraged foods I had eyed dubiously, and apparently she'd always wanted a homestead.  She joked that her fetish for the farm to table movement meant that she probably should have been born back in the era when personal farming had actually been a thing. 

Hell, when she had found out that Cas kept chickens she had been over the moon, although he hadn’t been too thrilled when she had talked about potentially raising some for meat.

Apparently all his chickens had names, and he was rather attached.

Just the night before she had asked me to help her start measuring out where she was going to build some base frames for the winter grow boxes she wanted, and I was only to happy to acquiesce.  When she had first arrived, her requests had been hesitant, as if she had been afraid she was going to be imposing on us or something.  Asking me for something that couldn't be consumed or shoved into a bag to flee?  I was only too happy to oblige her. 

It was the little requests for things like that which made me the happiest, because she was making herself at home, in a real and permanent way.  A few weeks ago we’d finally been able to get her some clothes too, courtesy of a nearby military surplus store that had been pretty well picked over.  It had been a bit of a shock when there had been a plethora of things for her to choose from, considering.  The clothes she’d picked were simple and comfortable and practical things that she had been delighted to find in the old surplus store.  Cargo pants and a long sleeved shirt, nothing special by any means.  I had been unprepared for how excited she’d been to find them, because as she had warned me, she was a bit hard to fit due to being itty bitty when her size wasn’t carried.  Most surplus places didn’t bother.  Most regular places didn’t bother either, apparently.

Therein lay the problem.

Her incredibly tiny fucking feet were still bare as a third world orphan's, despite all of our best efforts.  A men’s size three?  Pfft, who’d even heard of such a damned thing?  Apparently no one.  She needed good boots, but her feet were a women’s size freaking five.  THAT was the damned conundrum.  Who made good boots for kids?

"I don't practice, and I don't pout,"  I finally said defensively,  "and it's not my fault you've got gnome feet."

She shifted on the seat with a sigh and rolled her eyes, before looking back out the windshield.  “I tried to warn you.  A decent pair of boots is going to be really hard to find for me.”

Gripping the steering wheel tightly I ignored the muffled chuckle from the back seat, casting a glance back to the bearded joker in the mirror, who was looking way too amused by the whole argument.  The prophet had taken on a protective older bother role for Kenz, which was actually pretty sweet.  They spent a lot of time when she was inside the bunker together.  He seemed to enjoy listening to her explain how to cook and about pleasant memories of her work at the bakery and the restaurant  she’d wanted to open and how it was going to incorporate the local farms from her hometown.  Often I could hear them laughing from the kitchen, laughing about some weird antic from her past or college story.  It was a weird sort of escapism for both of them, and I couldn’t complain with the results when she made dinner.

Never thought I’d eat freaking eggplant willingly.

I couldn’t really ride him for laughing at the current situation though.  It was an amusing argument, to be fair, because the whole thing _was_ circled around her feet, and how impossibly tiny they were.

“I refuse to believe that there is nowhere to find decent shoes in your size.”

Chuck laughed from the back seat.  “Where would we even begin to look?”

Kenzie laughed along with him and rolled down her window, sticking her face out into the late summer breeze without immediately answering.  It was the beginning of September, and autumn was just around the corner.  As much as I enjoyed the view of her in nothing but my oversized t-shirts, it was good to see her, whole and in the real world.  My Alpha had claimed her Omega, and as much as I tried to curb it, I didn’t deny it.  What I hadn’t expected though was how quickly she would mean more to me than just an Omega; just how quickly she would become so much more than just some girlfriend, or lover too.  The depth of the feeling made me uncomfortable if I dwelled on it for too long, especially when sleep eluded me and I just watched her face in the dark.  There was nothing in the world I didn't want to give her, and there was no length I wouldn't go to for her.  The woman had me wrapped as firmly around her little finger without even trying, and it made me want to promise her the moon. 

I didn’t want her to feel like she needed to go without anything if I could help it, but damnit, I never thought it was going to be impossible to find a pair of shoes.

“Malls,” she said absently after a moment breaking the contemplative silence,  “especially the really fancy department stores, usually carry my size.  They use them for the displays mostly.  Some of the hiking stores too, or maybe a Harley Davison store?  A goodwill?  It’s too bad that army surplus place didn’t have any…”

“Hey, that’s not a bad idea, and the mall here isn’t too far away”  Chuck interrupted even as my scowl deepened, frowning at the road ahead.  Sure, a mall was a great place to gather supplies; also a great place to get killed in this world.  Just watch a Zombie movie.

I didn’t even have to say anything before Kenz turned to look back at him with a frown of her own, though.  It made my inner Alpha puff a bit in satisfaction, because in that instant she and I were thinking the same thing.  “If zombie movies taught me anything, it’s that malls should always be avoided during the apocalypse.”

Chuck leaned forward though so his face was up between ours.  “Yeah, but it’s not like we’re gonna really be shopping around, there’s a specific goal in mind.  We should at least scope it out.  If it looks clear we can at least stop hunting for your Barbie boots.”

She was shaking her head, laughing it off, even as I understood the truth of his statement.  If the nearby mall was actually clear there was potentially a ton of shit we could grab, depending on how ransacked it had been.  Truthfully it was also probably the best place to find her shoes.  We’d already looked in four other likely locations, and this last one had me a little desperate because I couldn’t think of anywhere else to really check.  Snow was going to start falling in a couple of months, and the temperature had already started dropping at night.  The single pair of flip flops we’d been cut down to fit her tiny ass feet weren’t gonna cut it as it got colder.

“He’s not wrong.”  I finally conceded, glancing over to the shocked look on her face, which made me shrug.  “We can scope it out, see how it looks, and make sure we’re quick.  If it looks sketchy we’ll think of somewhere else, but the damned place is just around the corner.”

*

“I can’t believe we got so lucky.”

She was beaming down at the hiking boots we had been able to find at an REI that had been in the eerily abandoned mall, almost skipping down the walkway as we moved back to where we had entered.  The entire interior was nothing but dried up fountains and dead potted plants when we entered through one of the side entrances, quickly scouting the place to see if there was any obvious threat.  We had been planning on going into the big upscale department store we'd parked next to, the kind I had never in my life set foot in, when she had noticed the REI on the mall directory.  The change in plans had been worth it when she had been able to find a pair of hiking boots in her size from the fairly empty store.

Aside from the mass looting, it was obvious from the layers of dust and general stale smell that no one other than vermin had been in this mall for a good long time.  Our footsteps in the disturbed dust were the only tracks we saw aside from your garden variety wildlife.  The whole place was so quiet it was almost eerily surreal.  Every noise we made echoed through the empty halls, but aside from a couple of scampering rats we were the only living things in the cavernous building.

“Is there anything else we need while we’re here?”  Chuck asked as he looked around the multiple levels and vaulted rooftop, the skylights making the dust we had kicked up glitter in the air.  It seemed to add to the air of general disuse that was hanging around the place. 

She looked around thoughtfully for a moment as we stopped outside the entrance to the mall we had used, the dark gaping maw of the department store not far off. When she glanced at it she shrugged and then jerked her head in its direction.

“I could always use more than one pair of shoes I guess, and their shoe department is on the ground floor.  They usually have sneakers and stuff in my size.”  She started moving towards the opening, glancing back when we moved to follow, her raised eyebrow speaking volumes.  “I’ll just be a sec, no worries.  See if there's anything else on the directory we should check out while we're here.”

“You sure?”  I asked, feeling a little uneasy at the thought of her going alone, my Alpha rising angrily at the thought of my Omega being away from me for any reason while vulnerable, not that she saw herself that way.

She moved back towards me with a smile and stretched up on her toes to peck me on the lips.  Her mouth tasted like heaven and it wasn’t enough, it was never enough.   I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her off her feet, deepening the kiss causing Chuck to look away a bit embarrassed.  The man had known me for a while, but he didn’t usually get to see my affectionate side, especially not since loosing Sammy.  When I was done kissing her a pretty rose flush was under her lightly bronzed skin, and it did things to me that I knew she could feel. 

She just laughed lightly as she settled back down on her heels, her eyes dancing, but her hand was firm against my chest.  “I’ll just be a moment Dean, I promise.  If I see a rat or something, I’ll scream.  Five minutes, tops.  If I’m not out in five you can come and get me, ok?”

I bent down and kissed her again, knowing that I needed to curb the Alpha in me that wanted to be overprotective.  Nothing here warranted me constantly breathing down her neck, and she had a point, checking the directory wasn't a bad idea.  Besides, I really needed to get used to the idea that there were going to be times when we were going to be apart for more than a day.  It was an uncomfortable inevitability.  Honestly, I needed to start thinking about giving her a serious crash course in how to survive my world, because as much as she was aware of the demons, she wasn't a hunter.  She was completely ignorant to the truth of the depths of the world of monsters, and I needed to educate the hell out of her, but I didn’t want to, not yet.  Part of me still wanted to be her savior, her protector, her shield against everything dark.  I didn’t want to think of her having to defend herself, I wanted to think about always providing her with safety like my inner Alpha demanded for his mate. 

Instead of giving into my Alpha I pulled back, giving her a grin and a swat on the ass.  “Then hop to it sweetheart, the clock is running.”

Sticking out her tongue she jogged off for the door even as I looked at my watch before glancing at the mall directory. I might have been trying to lighten the mood, but she was literally getting five minutes, no more.  No part of me was actually comfortable with her going off on her own.

*

“So you want to start training her?  Are you sure that’s a good idea?”  Chuck asked with a furrowed brow as we leaned against a planter, looking in on the darkness Kenz had gone off into, waiting for her to re-emerge.  There were a couple of places I had noticed on the directory I wanted to ask her about when she came out, but the clock was still running, so I waited. 

“It’s gonna have to happen sooner rather than later.”  I said with a shrug.

“But she already knows those sigils and stuff, isn’t that enough?”  Chuck’s tone was almost plaintive.

“I don’t like the thought of her training either man, but in this world, when have the basics been enough?  She’s gonna find out about everything sooner or later, right?  It's an elephant in the room she's not even aware of, and she needs to know about it.  About me, about Sammy…  I don’t really want it to be…  you know…”

It had been three minutes and forty-seven seconds when the security gate suddenly came crashing down out of nowhere, cutting off whatever Chuck had been about to say in response.

We both jumped, surging forward.

My face must have shown my horror plainly, if the Demon’s reaction was anything to go by when I saw him. The smirk on the assholes face as he stepped into view, on the other side of the security gate,  _inside_ _the store with Kenzie_ , was full of self-assured satisfaction because of it.

“Been a while,” the hulking SS tattoo bastard sneered. “That’s a pretty distinct classic you’ve got there. I was gonna wait until you guys headed back out to grab the bitch, maybe steal your ride, but then, providence.” He held out his arms, his eyes trailing with a fondness over the metal grating.

Blinking, I was shocked and enraged at the sight of the same son of a bitch from that rainy day outside that trailer on the freeway.  I threw myself at him before I could think about it.  The black-eyed, skinhead, son of a bitch laughed in my face as I was brought up short by the metal separating us.  He was less than three feet from me, and I couldn’t fucking get to him.

He purposefully took a deep breath, scenting the air, rolling his eyes closed as he let out an obscene groan.

“You didn’t claim the bitch.”  His voice held a sadistic mirth, his breath hot and rancid in my face.  His craggy skin broke out into an ugly grimace of a grin as he met my eyes again, the angles of his face harsh from the heavy shadows.  “You’re fucking her, but you haven’t claimed her.  I must have stepped on a fucking leprechaun.”

He laughed, and I could understand why it haunted her dreams.  “You really thought you could bring that little bitch out and I wouldn’t find you?  That I couldn’t smell that ripe little cunt?  You thought you would stop me from getting my hands on the pussy I’ve been chasing down for years?  I’ve been _waiting_  for you to let her get away from you.  For you to make a mistake like this.  You stole that cunt from me on the freeway, after _years_  of hunting that pussy down, and now?”

He stepped back into the shadows as I pulled out my gun, but his voice didn’t fade as he taunted,  “You’re gonna get to listen as I rape your bitch to death now, boy.” 

His laugh boomed throughout the empty remains of the mall.

“ ** _KENZIE!_** ” I roared, my blood cold as I shook the security gate in a futile gesture of denial.

Fuck I hate it when my Alpha’s right.

 

***************************

 

The couple of pairs of trainers I had found lay forgotten on the dusty tile floor as panic rolled through me like a living thing.  I crouched down behind a perfume counter, my hands clamped over my mouth as I tried to calm my breathing, my whole body shaking at the sound of that fucking _laugh_  again.  He was here.  That fucking skinhead from my nightmares was here, and there was a wall between me and Dean.

My mind was doing a panicked little loop as I tried to process that information, terror gripping me.  Even though Dean had told me that the son of a bitch had been outside of that trailer, that whole thing was still too hazy for it to seem real.   _How_  could he be here now?  How could I not have smelled him?  The mall had been empty. We had been _alone_. _We had been alone_. It had been _safe_. 

This was real though.  He was real, and I was not imaging that fucking laugh.

When I had seen the gate come crashing down, years of running had dropping me instantly into cover, and so I had seen and heard fucking _everything_.

Dean couldn’t get in, and I had no idea where the black-eyed son of a bitch had gone.  I closed my eyes and counted to three slowly, not willing to risk longer before acting, because the one thing I lacked was _time_.  Speed was of the essence now, but I was trying to calm my mind so I could figure out how to at least give myself a fighting chance, and in my need to escape I was willing to grasp at straws.  Taking quick stock of my situation I had a quick plan.  It wasn’t a great plan, but it was a plan, and that was better than nothing.

Part of my was grateful these places were generally laid out the same, with the cosmetics section set right there by the ground floor mall entrance to immediately ensnare the poor unsuspecting female back in the day, bracketing the escalators so you never had a choice but to come into contact with it if your goal was the upper floor.  I was surrounded by perfume, which to an Alpha could be slightly overpowering to the olfactory senses.  If nothing else it would help to cover my scent as I bolted for the escalator and the upper floor.  If I was really lucky I could get out into the main thoroughfare of the mall.  At least out there, it would be easier to meet up with Dean.  Also if I wasn’t trapped like a fucking rat, I might have a fighting chance.

The laugh was still echoing as I quietly slid open the cabinet next to where I was squatting and started opening what bottles I could with shaking hands.  As quietly as I could with my almost violent trembling, I put them on their sides sides as I moved behind the counter towards my escape path.  It was an awkward duck walk, as I was holding onto a few of the more fragile feeling ones so I could lob them as a distraction when it came time, but it kept me on my feet.  A cold sweat was covering me as I tried to not give myself away even as I heard Dean shaking the security gate.

“I can smell you, bitch,"  His taunting voice suddenly broke the silence, and I shuddered in fear,  "I remember your scent, you pretty, ripe little thing.  That Alpha’s been having his way with you on the regular, hasn’t he slut?  I can smell it.  I can smell _him_ on _you_.  I bet you love being his cum dumpster, whore.  You suck his cock with that pretty mouth of yours?  I bet that sweet little cunt of yours drips for him while you do it.  This whole place reeks of your whore stench, you know.  I bet he had you before he brought you here, all gift wrapped for me.  I bet your tight little cunt’s still wet from it,”  the monster taunted me out of the darkness as I inched along, but then his inhale echoed inhumanly through the building, causing me to shudder.

And then he groaned.

“Oh yeah, I remember that sweet smell,”  his voice was obscene and made my skin crawl.  In the background I could hear both Dean and Chuck swearing as they fought with security gate.  “You smelled so fucking good while you were in that trailer.  I loved watching you try and fist fuck your own cunt like the desperate bitch you are, even when you were so scared I could smell it."  His deep inhale echoed again, and I swallowed as I forced myself to keep inching along.  "Yeah, I can smell your fear now too.  Makes it even more delicious when I get my hands on you, fill your whore holes with my big dick.  You won’t even remember the feel of your boy’s cock when I’m done ruining you.  I’m gonna make him watch, bitch, just like I wanted to make your parents watch."

Dean snarled something that made him sound more animal than human, but it just seemed to egg the asshole on even as sweat moved down my spine.  "Did you know I wanted to watch my dogs take a turn breeding you?  I wanted to watch you cry as they fucked you like the bitch you were always meant to be.  I couldn’t wait to feel you screaming around my cock as they raped your cunt.  I bet they would have made you cum like the cock slut you are.”

The shiver of fear and revulsion I felt was hard to control, and my stomach rolled a little.  I was shaking more now, the terror making it hard to stay calm. 

“You think your new boy would have liked to watch my dogs rape your little cunt?  Maybe he’d be jealous watching them knot your whore hole, because I can just imagine your sweet little moans for them.  An Omega whore like you begs real pretty with that mouth I bet.  You think he’s gonna like watching you scream around my dick?  Maybe it’ll do him good to see how an Alpha’s supposed to fuck a bitch like you.”

“ **I’ll fucking _kill_  you, you son of a bitch!**” I heard Dean snarling as he slammed himself futility against the security gate. “ _ **KENZIE RUN!**_ ”

God damnit, the push from my Alpha made me itch to leave my cover, and I couldn’t, not yet.  I had to bite down the whimper that wanted to escape.  The sweat that had broken out over my whole body was physically dripping down me as I fought the command, inching silently towards escape.  My shaking was so violent I was surprised they couldn’t hear it, and I had to pause and calm myself so I didn't drop one of the fucking bottles in my hands and give myself away.

I still wasn’t ready when I reached the end of the counter though, but at least part of my plan was working.  I could hear the demon’s Alpha body snorting from the overwhelming fragrances that were starting to be thick in the air.  The fragrances were so thick it got to the point where I couldn’t smell anything else either.  The demon let out a swear when he realized what I had done, letting me know he was still closer to Dean than he was to me, which was hopefully enough distance.

I moved, fast and low.

Years of running and desperation made me quick, I was just praying I was going to be quick enough.  Forcing myself to move, I lobbed the bottles I held in a couple different directions, but away from my intended path.  I bolted before even hearing the glass shatter.

Dean hollered my name again, his voice angry and threaded with fear.  I didn’t take the time to acknowledge it in any way, because I needed to get to that damned escalator.  I could hear the Alpha tearing through the dust covered displays as he looked for me now, snarling instead of taunting, and it was only going to be a bare moment before he spotted me on the unprotected escalator.

He was still across the store and I was halfway up the steps when he spotted me, and I didn’t dare look back as I pushed myself for more speed, knowing now it was a race literally for my life.

The sound of his snarls and curses, as he tore through the store like a monster, was more than enough incentive to keep me moving anyway.

The world tilted violently as I suddenly slipped and lost traction on the dust covered tile as I was taking a corner in my new shoes.  It was right when I reached the second floor and turned off the escalator, causing me to go down hard and slide into a display.  I slapped my hand to the floor in frustration as I pushed myself up from the ground, losing precious momentum and seconds as he gained on me, already at the base of the steps.  My feet scrambled for purchase as I pushed myself towards the upper mall entrance of the store, looking desperately over my shoulder for my pursuer.

Only to be brought up short when I collided with the metal grating, the noise a little shocking as it echoed through the stillness.

My fingers wrapped in the linkage as I stood, staring at the lowered security gate in disbelief, frozen in shock.  I had no escape route.  I was completely trapped in a department store with a madman who wanted to literally rape me to death.

No.  No, please no.

I turned, trying to look for another way out, but then he was there.

He slammed into me, and I crumpled into the very gate that had brought me up short, the echo of the impact made louder by the sudden silence that followed, like the world was holding it’s breath.  The wind was knocked out of me, and so for a moment I just gaped there like a landed fish even as he advanced on me, laughing that _fucking laugh_.

“Oh yeah, I’m gonna love knowing he can hear your bitch ass scream.  When he gets up here I'm gonna let him watch as I fucking claim you before we really get to the good stuff.”

His voice seemed to be coming from everywhere even as his hand closed around my ankle, pulling me a few feet away from the gate on my back.  Then he moved to crawl up my body even as my eyes rolled and I flopped against the floor, trying to get my body back under control as it gaped for oxygen.

He sniffed up me obscenely as he moved, covering me with his weight as his hands pushed my shirt up, exposing my bare breasts to the air.  His sour stench was now pervading my nostrils, mixing nauseatingly with the perfume.  My head was spinning and I was having issues focusing on anything other than the overwhelming need to draw a full breath.  For a moment everything was hazed with white, but then he viciously twisted my nipple and I drew a pained breath, the suddenly influx of oxygen a blessed relief.  His bulky form was crowding me against the floor, and I knew he was sneering down at me as I tried to get my eyes to stop rolling.

When I finally focused on his face, seeing those black eyes, I had a blazing moment of clarity.

I let my fist fly.

Just like when I had punched Dean on our first meeting, I knew that it wasn’t going to be my saving grace, but more of an act of desperation.  Not to mention a huge, giant, fuck you.

I think he had expected me to be like other Omegas, but I wasn’t going to curl up and die.  My parents and then Dean’s faces flashed through my mind, and I knew I had to fight, because they wouldn't want me to give up no matter how terrified I was.  If I had had been willing to fight when I had been dying in that trailer then I sure as hell was going to fight now, because for the first time in my recent memory I was fucking happy.  I had someone in my life who looked at me like the sun shined out of my ass.  I had friends again, fuck, I had a _family_ again.  God damnit I was able to cook and be clean and not wake up every morning in complete fucking terror for the first time in like, five years!  Like hell I was just going to lay down and play dead now, not when I had just discovered that life could actually be good again, not when my parents had been killed trying to keep me safe.  

This asshole was going to work for every _inch_.

He turned back at me with a snarl, and I hit him again, flying into movement as I brought up my knees, trying to hit him in the groin, my body writhing as I tried to break free of his grip.  Punching, kicking, scratching, clawing... it didn't matter, I was a flurry of violent movement, and it was satisfying when I left gouges from my nails in his face as I slashed at his eyes.

Now, I may be an Omega, but if you’ve ever been in a relationship with a cop you know they are huge on personal self defense.  I had been engaged to one before the world had ended, and he had made sure I knew how to throw a punch, _and_  where to land a blow.  I was pretty satisfied to see that I had landed the couple of punches I'd been able to get in perfectly on the assholes now split cheekbone, and at least the son of a bitch was gonna have one eye swollen shut now.  Score for me.

Then he hit me back.

There's a saying in prize fighting; everyone has a plan until they get hit, and brother, did that big bastard know how to hit.  I saw stars, blood filling my mouth, stopping my struggle dead as he stunned me. I guess he was pissed I punched him.

His hand hit me again, and there was nothing I could really do against the strength of the bigger man at that point.  For a moment the only sounds that filled the air were the sounds of flesh hitting flesh as he knocked the ever living shit out of me.  He was sitting on me to keep me still, which was making it hard to breathe properly. It was only after my face had numbed to the blows he stopped, scowling at me. While I was trying to gather my wits I didn't even try and move even as he hovered above me, panting from the exertion of beating me into submission.  

He jerked up my head to look at him by my hair. I realized while his eye had swollen shut, so now had both of mine too, and there was an ache in my jaw that spoke of more than just a bruise. Blood was dribbling down my face, bubbling in my nostril as I tried to control my breathing.  My head was ringing and spinning simultaneously, and I felt a weird sort of separation from the scenario, like my head was filling with wool.

“You should be screaming little whore, we’ve only just started,”  he said menacingly, giving me a shake that made my head swim more than it should have.

I spit a mouthful of blood into his face in response.

He snarled in blind rage as he sat up, wiping my blood out of his eyes.  There was no way, in hell, I was going to give the asshole the pleasure of my screams.  Not now, not ever.  The whimper that escaped me, however, was out of my control when I watched him draw his fist back at my insolence.

“ _ **NO!**_ ”  The voice was Dean’s.

The blow didn’t fall, or time had stopped, or…  something.

I rolled my head so I could see the security gate, where my Alpha, where _Dean_ , was standing.

But he wasn’t looking at me.

I was confused and everything was hazy, noises not making sense, my blood suddenly rushing in my ears as everything sounded like it was deep under water when I moved my head again.  I coughed up a mouthful of blood, struggling lazily for breath.  Dim tones told me people around me were talking.  Dean was yelling something, his mouth moving, but I couldn’t hear him.  It didn’t matter, he wasn’t yelling at me, he wasn’t even looking at me.  He was looking at something else, something above…

My attention turned back to the thing that was going to beat me to death and realized that no, time hadn’t stopped.

Instead _someone_  had stopped him.

The man was impossibly tall, wearing an all white suit, his face a handsome mask of disdain that was… familiar.  Hair brown… eyes hazel… face so familiar it was like I knew it.  Knew it so well his name was on the tip of my tongue.  The demon who was going to kill me looked scared, looked like he was begging as the man in white held his raised fist with no effort in an elegantly long fingered hand.  The man in white focused on me and tilted his head as if he was intrigued.

Then suddenly the skinhead just… burned… from the inside out, turned to ash, and just… vanished.  Like he had never existed.

My body fell bonelessly and I lay on the ground, just trying to breath through the blood bubbling in my throat as I looked up at the man in white, everything in me focused on him almost like an anchor point.  He was cocking his head in the other direction now as he looked at me, but there was a detachment in his eyes that scared me in a way that not even my skinhead stalker had been able to manage.  Dimly I wondered if he was just going to stand there and watch me die.

He was looking at me like I was the most interesting insect specimen he had ever seen.

I wondered why he wasn’t paying any mind, at all, to Dean, whom I was aware was railing against the security gate with renewed vigor, just a few scant feet away.  Chuck was yelling something too, right next to him, but I couldn’t make it out.  Everything was becoming dim.

The man in white was reaching for me just as my consciousness slipped away, but I think I heard Dean yelling my name.

 

***********************

 

It had been days since I had slept.

The image of Sammy’s visage with Lucifer’s grin, as he scooped up Kenzie’s limp form, haunted me whenever I shut my eyes.

I scrubbed my hand over my face to try and chase it away, my eyes dry and hurting from staring at the sky into nothing, trying to not even blink.  My hand was loosely wrapped around the neck of a whiskey bottle, my current last resort.  My bedroom was _not_ a refuge to hide in, unlike every other time I had needed to run away from a problem.  Her smell had started to fade from it, and so I shut the door, fearing the day I was going to open it and nothing of her would be left.  That meant that the rest of the Bunker wasn’t a refuge either, for little bits of her had been left everywhere.  A book she had been looking at here, a plate from a snack she had brought someone there.  An entire table full of her ideas in the library... 

Fuck that kitchen.  I couldn’t even think about the kitchen.

Now, no one knew how to act around me, and I didn’t know how to act around them.  My feeling fluctuated between impotent rage and all consuming loss.  Lucifer, wearing the face of my baby brother, had kidnapped the Omega I had come to care about more than I even wanted to admit.  I was broken and volatile.

A week.  An entire week since that fucking day in the mall.  I didn't know if she was even alive anymore. 

It had all happened so fast it still seemed like a nightmare.  I had reached the second floor with Chuck right on my heels, only to find myself in the same situation as the ground floor, only now the Demon had Kenzie on the floor, scant feet away.  In that moment I had been trying desperately to get to her as a demon had been trying to beat her to death.  Her face had been a swollen mask of blood under matted hair when he had stopped at my approach, and I could still remember hearing him tell her that she should be screaming.  There had been a small bubble of pride in me when she’d spit in his face in response.  That was my girl, my little Omega, and the Alpha in me was ready to rip the gate apart to get to her and murder the _fuck_  out of him for daring to put his hands on her.

The next second I had helplessly watch Lucifer appear, destroy the demon, then grab her and vanish without any further preamble.  Seconds, it had been fucking seconds and he had just…  vanished with her, without a trace.

Fucking Devil walks in white on Sundays bullshit indeed.

Now Baby was parked in the middle of the road, in the same position we’d been in that moment that had been the change of everything, that moment I'd found _her_.

Almost draining the bottle I lay back against the hood of the Impala, laying my forearm over my eyes against the harsh blue of the September sky.  In the back seat lay a grimy bag that contained what was left of her worldly possessions that we hadn’t bothered to get earlier from that fucking trailer.  She’d always shrugged it off when I had offered, saying that there wasn’t anything of real use.  I had always meant to anyway, because I figured she probably had something sentimental in it, just hadn’t found the time before now.  To be perfectly honest, I hadn’t wanted to be reminded of what had almost come to be if I hadn’t found her.  I had nightmares about it, about having found her too late, jerking me awake with the need to reassure myself that she was there in my bed, and safe.  She had never denied me those nights, and my Alpha had reveled in the fact that she was so pliantly willing to be mine whenever I reached for her, all soft sighs and welcoming arms.

I should have gotten her stuff though, she had deserved as much, and so much more.  The dog eared, battered, cook book that had been in the bag made me feel like a dick, because she had obviously loved it. 

Then I had found the pistol that I could still remember had been burningly cold when I had ripped it from her hand, where the barrel had been pressed against her hair.

The bullet I had pulled from the thing bore an indentation in the primer, but was otherwise still whole, and it was only a miracle the fucking thing hadn’t gone off.  I’d almost dropped it because my hand had been shaking so bad.  My breathing had been hard to control at the evidence of how close it had been, how close she had been to killing herself, had sat in my hand.  She had been so determined to never be taken against her will that even half dead she had tried her damnedest to kill herself rather than be a victim to the unknown.  The bottle had been my answer to my nerves as that knowledge looped itself over and over in my head, but it did nothing to change the reality of the situation.

A bitter part of me wondered for a moment if it wouldn’t have been better if she had done it then, because then I wouldn’t be hurting like this.

As soon as I thought it I knew I was an asshole, and I sat up with a scowl, scrubbing a hand over my face and the long stubble on my jaw.  My glare swept the dead, dry, withered landscape even as I sucked down the dregs of the bottle before dragging the back of my hand over my mouth to wipe up the residue.  The bottle smashed in a satisfactory manner when I flung it with force against that fucking trailer with its lipstick seals.

Fucking LIPSTICK of all things.

Her smile came to my mind and I pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes, trying to push the image away with an impotent outcry, before I fell heavily back against the hood of the Impala again.

It wasn’t fucking fair, but what could I have expected?  I was cursed, I’d been cursed my whole goddamned life.  Why in the hell had I believed for even a moment that I could have anything good?  That I deserved even a moment of actual contentment?  I’d thought that maybe not having her be involved with the real bullshit, keeping her in the bunker or something, she’d be safe.  I guess I’d forgotten that I had denied God’s fated plan for me and told his golden boy to go eat a dick, even as I had literally lost my brother to the Devil.  My mom had burned for that pre-destined fate.

Hell, my father had given himself to a demon to save me to ensure that I lived to see the end of things.

Even the angel who had delivered me from perdition had lost his fucking mind and most of his abilities after falling from grace, all because I told Michael to go eat a dick.

All because of ME.

Why in the fuck did I think that I could save her from the fate that befell everyone I cared about?  It was the end of the world and I had been foolish enough to think that maybe I, of all people, caught a small break.  I had found a fucking Omega who had hand fed me cherry god damned pie in bed after I’d fucked her into oblivion, and then let me do it all over again with cherry still on our tongues.  A woman who liked to dance when she thought she was alone. Who had charmed the pants off of Bobby with a thoughtless kiss on the cheek good morning every morning when she handed him his cup of coffee.  A person who’d made Cas focus on something more than the physical pleasures of the moment, and who'd gotten Chuck to laugh freely for the first time in years.  Someone who had looked up at me with such TRUST it broke my heart even as I had fucked her in every way imaginable. 

Damnit, I should have known better.

No part of me wanted to go back to the Bunker.  Every time I was there my skin itched to be out looking for her, even though I didn’t even know where to start.  Part of me had been terrified to come back to this fucking trailer, scared that I would find her here, left as a clear message from Lucifer.

Fuck I was so scared for her.  Who knew what Lucifer’s plans were?  It was obvious how his kind felt about Omegas.

I couldn’t forgive myself for whatever horrors she was going through, I could only hope she was still alive, somewhere.  That she hadn't... 

Thunder caught my attention, and I sat up, scowling.  Either a storm was building on the horizon, or it was demon sign.  I wasn’t sure I could honestly bring myself to care at that moment though, the alcohol in my system not being enough to kill my anger and guilt, but enough to bring out my apathy.  The storm reminded me of the day I had found her, in that damned grey shell in front of me.  

Damn it, I was loathe to go back to the bunker where the guys would stop talking the moment I was near, but I couldn’t stay here forever.

A part of me wanted to burn the trailer to the ground just for an outlet to my, fuck, my everything.  The need to rage and destroy was strong in me, almost to the point of overwhelming.  Call it rage.  Call it despair.  Call it whatever freudian thing you could think of.  I hated that trailer.  I hated the bunker.  I hated the sun and the sky and the weather.  I hated that she was gone.  I hated that there was nothing I could do.

To go back to my empty bed that was smelling less and less like her sounded worse than my torture in the pit.

Even the stupid trailer still smelled a little like her when I had ventured in, but then again that could have been just my desperate imagination.

Thunder rolled again and I eyeballed the dark clouds.  If it _was_ demon sign, I would deal with them when I came across them, if it was nothing more than rain, well…  we could probably use the water.

*

It was dark when I was making my way back to the bunker.  The Doors, _Riders on the Storm_ , was playing in my head because otherwise I just got stuck in the same mental loop.  What more can a man do when he is full of impotent emotions boiling in a pressure cooker to distract himself?  I used to go drinking and get some tail before the end of the world, but that was no longer an option due to my life decisions.  Fuck me for bringing on the end of the world, right?  Not that I wanted anyone else anymore.  If I had just played my part none of this would have happened, and Kenzie would never have been a part of my life.  Fuck, she would have married that Alpha cop she had told me about, Keegan something, and probably would have been knee deep in pups by now.

Instead she was just another victim to my curse.  I swore and slammed my fist into the dash in frustration.

Lightening slashed through the black sky, illuminating something in the road ahead, which caught my eye.  I slowed, squinting through the sheeting rain trying to make sense of what I was seeing.  A figure was in the roadway ahead of me, standing stock still in the middle of the rainy, ruined landscape.  Old missions full of highway ghosts with Sammy flashed through my mind as Baby rolled to a stop, my headlights illuminating something that I couldn’t believe I was seeing.

She was still wearing the black thermal and green cargo pants she had been in that day, her feet in the hiking boots that we had searched so hard for.  Her hair was hanging wetly around her head, her arms wrapped around her body to ward against the chill of the early autumn wind and rain.  Even through the weather and the headlights she was staring straight at me, and her eyes were very much alive.  I scrambled to get out of the car, moving towards her.

_MacKenzie_.

Lightening slashed and her piercing glare stopped me, clearer now that I was closer as the headlights illuminated her.  The evidence of the violence I had witnessed was still on her face, her eyes still slightly swollen and bruised.  Her cheek and jaw were covered in a yellowing, purple and green mottled, fading bruise accompanied by a healing gash to her lip that spoke of more than bruising.  Every bit of her expression was body language was controlled and almost unnaturally still.  Her eyes were stormier than the thunderheads that raged around us, however, slowing my approach.  As I did the storm suddenly gained in ferocity, the wind whipping her dark hair around her face, clinging wetly to her cheeks.  I reached for her, only to have my hand violently slapped away.  Another flash lit the sky even as her fist connected unexpectedly with my face and I staggered back, looking at her slack jawed in astonishment.

“ _He's your brother!_ ” the thunder clapped even as her raised voice carried over the storm, and my heart was in my throat at the raw rage that was in her voice.  Her lip split again as she yelled at me above the storm, and another flash made everything stark white, the red of the blood looking garish against her bruised face in that instant.

“ _Lucifer_  is your fucking _brother_! _YOU_  are the  _vessel_  of the God damned  _Archangel Michael!_ ”

Another crack of thunder seemed to shake the very ground under my feet even as my head swam, all the blood draining from it.  Obviously whatever expression my face decided to settle on was the wrong one as her lip curled and she slugged me again.  I didn’t even try to defend myself as she railed against me, her temper even with the thunder and lightening raging around us, swearing and calling me names that I had no defense for, because she was right.

Liar. Bastard. Coward. All of the above.

Blood was flowing out of my nose, and my eye was going to swell shut.  The girl knew how to throw a punch, and this time she hadn’t been half dead.  When she finally stopped, her forehead was resting between her fists on my chest, and her shoulders were heaving.  It didn’t matter if she hated me.  It honestly didn’t matter if she didn’t want to have anything to do with me ever again. She was alive, and I was just grateful that she was for that, alive and well enough to beat the snot out of me.

My arms moved without thinking and I just wrapped myself around her despite the situation, pressing my lips to the top of her head as my eyes clenched shut.  I wasn’t sure when she had started crying.  Hell, I wasn’t sure when I started crying.  She just trembled there in my arms for a moment in the rain, burrowing herself into my chest.  Then she sniffled, wiped her face while her head was bowed, and pushed then firmly back so she could look up at me.  Her rain wet face was reddened from her crying, but her expression was stony, even with the blood smeared across her chin.

“Get in the car Dean.”

Without more than that she stepped away from me, the back of her hand dabbing at her seeping lip wound, and I turned to watch her through the sheeting rain in slight disbelief.  She walked to Baby’s passenger side and opened the door before shooting me another look that would have killed me if it could.

“Get in the fucking car, Dean.”

 


	6. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of revealed truths and their consequences. In a world where the decision of one man doomed the future, how accountable for his actions could he be held? And how far reaching can the consequences be? Broken trust can be such a bitch. 
> 
> Now come the hard decisions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dean's angst is hard to write, the bastard. 
> 
> Thank you for sticking around! Sorry this update took so long, had a few chapters get totally deleted (unrecoverable, *weep*) and rewriting was a bitch. Especially Dean, damn his angst. Seriously that man's self-loathing is pretty epic. 
> 
> Please enjoy and feel free to let me know what you think. As always, fixing errors (and terrible writing) when I find it.

Dean was crying.

I don't really know why that gave me pause, but it did.  I shouldn't have cared.  A few tears should have been justified for what I'd been forced to endure.  Tears were warranted for how trapped I found myself in this bullshit.  Bullshit that was literally cosmic in scale.  The man sitting on the floor in a puddle of rain water, looking like a kicked puppy, was supposed to be the vessel of the Archangel Michael for god's sake.  He had literally unwittingly helped break magical crazy locks and unleashed Armageddon.   _Literally_.

On a scale of a hangnail to a nuke for how _fucked_  I was now, due to all of these lies and omissions of those little facts, I was Chernobyl.

That being said, when I stepped out of the shower room and saw him sitting on the floor across the hall, my anger towards him flagged.  He was a big pathetic ball of sadness, looking up at me, channeling the very essence of regret.  I kept my expression was blank.  I was just so exhausted and overwhelmed by everything, I didn't trust what my face would show if left to its own devices.  I didn't even know how to react to him right then really, given everything.

He looked a mess, and not just from me slugging him. Bruised green eyes and a bloodied straight nose were red rimmed and wet.  His body posture was curled in on itself, like a small boy who'd broken a window with a baseball and was waiting for retribution, trying to make his big body look smaller.  He had his arms resting on his knees.  Those strong hands of his that had _so much blood_  dripping from them were hanging limply down between his long bent legs as he peered up at me. He was looking more wounded than he had any right to at that moment.  His hair and clothing were still wet from the rain, although he had shed his outer layer, leaving him in his customary jeans and black shirt.  I was guessing he had been sitting in that spot since I had swept into the showers to try and scrub Lucifer off my skin.

When he saw me he drew a shuddering, wrecked breath.  His lower lip was trembling like a child's caught in a lie.

It wasn't an inaccurate description of the current situation.

I just stood there for a moment, staring at him, and he stared straight back at me.  It was like really seeing him for the first time all over again.  Especially now that I knew, now that I had _seen_.  Everything.

Absolutely everything.

When Lucifer had ditched me on that black cracked pavement, I had initially thought he was fucking with me.  I'd stood there, shaking in the rain, trying not to flinch at the lightning and thunder.  I hadn't moved until the rumble of the Impala had been audible over the storm, and I had turned to watch the approaching headlights.  After the head games and the nightmares and the delight in my dismay as facts were revealed to me, I wasn't even sure what his game was anymore.  He never let me rest, probing the very depths of my mind, enjoying my turbulent emotions and desperate reactions.  There wasn't even an accurate way for me to guess how long he had been torturing me.  Every fiber of my being had expected Lucifer to eventually kill me, and I times I had even begged for it.  It hadn't taken long for me to get to the point of begging either. 

The Devil _loathed_  my kind.

I mean, the fallen angel scorned humanity, he made that perfectly clear.  When he had thrown his toddler tantrum about it, in a truly terrifying manner, it had driven the point home.  He had gone on and on about how he had actually been the only good true son of God, how humanity didn't deserve any of its blessings, blah blah blah.

However, he truly  _hated_  Omegas with a passion I have only seen matched by Julia Child's love of butter.

More than once he had described to me, in great detail, how much he wanted to torture me until I succumbed to my 'baser ways'.  After he got to enjoy my capitulation, he wanted to punish me some more for it.  Not only did he tell me about it, he showed me, time and time again.  I had nightmares of demons riding me, raping me, shredding me to ribbons, all the while he stood above me and whispered encouragements with a leering smile.  I would wake up screaming, whole and unhurt aside from the beating I had received in that mall, with him standing over me.

Then he would grip my broken jaw in steel fingers and lean over me so that I could feel the brush of his lips against my ear.  I could still clearly remember the press of his body, so much bigger than Dean's, as he had loomed over me.  Always, he forced me to describe the physical sensations from my nightmares.  He was interested to know if Omegas could truly feel pain, or if we were just crying wolf with our tears.  In his eyes, Omegas were abhorrent subhuman Jezebels out to seduce and breed with the true humans, the Alphas, that God had created.  As far as Lucifer was concerned, Omegas were nothing but self-lubricating fleshlights that could cry, cum, and get knocked up.

We were the "very seeds of deceit and corruption.  You whores DIE if denied an Alpha for long enough.  You exist to be _nothing_  but a corrupter of men a bearer of bastards."

He had been appalled that apparently, Sam's body thought that I smelled delicious and had naturally reacted as all Alphas do.  It was the one and only time Lucifer had ever really put his hands on me, although he couldn't bring himself to truly be intimate with an Omega.  He hadn't done more than hold me down and rut against me, but it was enough.  I was never going to tell Dean that I knew what his brother looked like when he came.

Or how close Lucifer had come to unconsciously letting Sam's Alpha body sink its teeth into my neck as he peaked, claiming me.  The thought made me physically ill.

My time in the shower hadn't helped me clear my swirling thoughts either, nor had it truly gotten rid of the feeling of ghost fingers on my skin.  It also hadn't honestly been enough time for me to process what my new found freedom actually meant because it wasn't freedom.

Not exactly.

Lucifer had been free with Sam's array of memories of Dean, delighting in describing the worst in the man before me.  The Devil had enjoyed painting my mate as a monster.  Time and time again he had shown me just what Dean was capable of, putting me in the place of victim's long past in old memories.  He had created scenarios that felt so real I still had trouble shaking off the feeling of his hands on me.

Sometimes, when I had almost caved, it had been impossible to discern what was material or not.  It had been those moments that I had been convinced that Dean had actually hurt me in every way imaginable.  Only, I would suddenly wake up, gasping and unharmed.  My only solace was that in my nightmares, the monster wearing Dean's face laughing at my pain had never smelled like Dean.

Even from where I was standing his _real_  smell was washing over me, and I subconsciously took nothing but comfort from it.  Nothing about the man before me, the man who had let me slug the shit out of him in the rain, matched the monster Lucifer had shown me.  The beast from those nightmares was a cold and calculating killer, not the man who had held me so gently after I had bloodied him.  As I stood before him for a moment, seeing his distraught face, weighing what I knew from what I had learned, I was lost.  On one hand, biology hadn't planted any seeds in me yet and I was still unbonded, I could try and run.  On the other hand...

"What am I supposed to do now?"

I didn't realize I had spoken until Dean suddenly licked his lips, sniffling.

"What do you mean?"  His voice was rough.

I just stared at him, honestly not truly knowing how to answer.

The silence stretched again, and then his visage crumbled.  He buried his face in those big hands of his and his body shuddered as he choked out a sob.  It killed a part of me, but the rest of me was too overwhelmed to care.  This was all because he had lied to me about the realities of his life and now I was going to pay a part of the price, if I liked it or not.

I concentrated on my breathing as much as I could, trying to stay calm.  It had been my life here, with my new family, that had kept me together during my time with the Devil.  I had found comfort and solace in the memory of all the times I had smacked Bobby's fingers away from food I was preparing in the kitchen.  The lazy time spent laying out in the grass stoned with Cas as we cloud watched under the pretense of gardening.  Or just the way Chuck had smiled and listened as I had been explaining what I was doing when I cooked, basically acting like a personal cooking show.  They and those memories had brought me comfort, even as Lucifer had revealed the truth to me about all of them, and I learned so many things I hadn't known.  They were things they had deliberately hidden from me for one reason or another, things they _should_  have told me.  It was just one more thing I had ordered myself I needed to go over with them IF I escaped.

At least, I had found solace in the idea of escaping to them until Lucifer had left me on that road in the dark.  There, in the raging weather, he finally explained the reason for tormenting the shit out of me but otherwise leaving me completely unharmed.  You know, instead of gruesomely murdering me to torment Dean just that much more for refusing to be an obedient little hairless ape.

Apparently, he wasn't a part of the Omega purge in any way, not that he really condemned it either though.  In fact, he had been thinking of looking for an Omega like me anyway.  If my kind weren't current so rare he would have flayed me alive just to teach Dean a lesson, but now I was too valuable.  Dean finding me had been serendipitous as far as Lucifer was concerned.  Fate's funny that way I guess. 

Right before he had abandoned me Lucifer had revealed his new end game and my role in it, confident in its infallibility.  I had no idea how to tell Dean without it sounding like a plot to a horror movie.  I still wasn't even sure how to broach the subject of his mountain sized omissions from his life stories without losing my shit again like I had on the road, much less actual Armageddon.

"It's all my fault."  I heard Dean choke out between his sobs.  There was a note in his voice that I responded to, my instincts telling me to comfort my mate.

Moving quietly across the floor, I knelt down in front of him, my knees at his toes, my hands fisted on my thighs.  He didn't move to look at me, just pushed his fingers harder into his eyes as he tried to control his breathing.  I gave him a moment to gather himself before, waiting with a practiced patience, even as I tried to gather my own thoughts.

"I'm so sorry Kenzie,"  his eyes were suddenly meeting mine, and they were shattered.  "I'm sorry I am such a selfish asshole, God I am so sorry."

"Why?"  I finally asked, my eyes tracing his face, noting the fatigue and distressed skin, how it looked like he hadn't slept or shaved in ages.  He looked nothing like the looming monster from my nightmares, and my Omega wanted to curl up in his lap and offer whatever comfort it could to its distressed Alpha, but I choked it back.

"If I had just said yes to Michael, none of this would have happened."  His voice sounded like a desperate confession.  "God had a plan for me and Sammy.  A plan.  We had fated roles and everything and I fucked it all to shit because I told them _all_  to go eat a dick.  All this is my fault Kenz.  Everything that has happened."

Those green eyes of his filled with anguish, "Fuck, I wish I had just let him..."

His face crumpled again, his hand once again moving to hide his eyes from me.

And there it was; there was the man who had risked his life for a stranger on the road and had taken her in without demanding anything in return.  There was the man who had the ability to hurt so many, willing to lay down his life for them instead.  There was the man acting as Atlas with the weight of the world on his shoulders, even though he had never asked for it.

There was the man who I had learned had sold his soul to save his beloved baby brother, and who had ended up in hell because of it.  There was my Mate.

Dean was by no means perfect, but he wasn't a monster; an idiot yes, but he was one of the best men I had ever met.

And suddenly, I wasn't lost anymore.

  
*************

  
I was crying like a bitch with a skinned knee and I couldn't care less.  Kenzie was right there, and yet somehow, completely out of my reach.  She despised me, and she had every right to.  I had ruined her _life_ , gotten her family murdered, doomed her to a life of constant terror on the run.  I'd proven, beyond a doubt now, that I couldn't protect her.  Her life was going to be short and violent and it was all my...

Her hands, strong and sure despite their small size, were suddenly pulling my hands away from my face.  She then lay them against my cheeks as she forced me to look at her.  I didn't want to meet her eyes, I was so scared of what I would see in them.  At the scent of the Omega before me, my Alpha wanted to nuzzle into her hand instead, kiss my way up her arm, just _hold_  her, but I couldn't.

"Dean, look at me."

I lost the right.

"Dean, _please_ , look at me."  The begging tone got to me, but it still took me forever to meet her intense watch.  Her eyes were solemn as she searched my face. "Is that why you think I'm upset?  Becuase you refused an Archangel?"

"I caused the fucking Apocalypse Kenzie, it was more than just saying no to something."

Her gaze was direct, her eyes like big silver mirrors that I didn't want to look into for too long.  I didn't want to see what was going to be reflected back at me.

She was making a chump out of me as she sat there with that stoic expression on her pretty face as I cried like a scared little kid.  Despite how thrashed she looked, she was still beautiful, the bruising not detracting from the symmetry of her features.  My Alpha was a writhing thing inside me, frantic to be drowning in the pretty Omega before me, but I knew I couldn't.  I desperately just wanted to reassure myself that she was there, whole and not just a fevered dream.

But I didn't have the _right_.

"Dean, listen to me very carefully; I am not mad at you for saying no to Michael."

My eyes snapped back to hers in disbelief.  Her expression suddenly melted from an icy mask to utter heartbreak, her lips parting in apparent shock before she spoke.

"How could I, an Omega, be mad at you for that?"

"How could you not blame me for everything _because_  you are an Omega?"

A sad smile passed her lips, and before I could say anything else she leaned forward and pressed her mouth to mine.  It was quick and chaste, and the sweetest kiss I have ever gotten because it didn't taste like a farewell.

It took me a moment to open my eyes because I didn't realize that I had closed them.

"Don't misunderstand me, Dean, I am incredibly pissed off.  At you, and at the guys, but,  "she held my face in her hands and her direct gaze made me feel exposed.  "I'm pissed because you lied to me and I had no idea what I was getting involved in, not because you refused to be a victim.  None of this is your fault.  How could I be mad at you for refusing to willingly participate in a fight to the death with your little brother?"

I ventured to reach for her, my fingertips barely daring to graze her uninjured cheek.  At the contact, her hands dropped from my face and her eyes closed.  She suddenly leaned her cheek into my hand, her damp hair tumbling over my fingers in a manner I never expected to experience again.  She sighed and when she pressed a kiss to my palm something in my chest loosened and my breath shuddered out of me embarrassingly.

She opened her eyes, and suddenly they were full of tears that just started streaming down onto my hand, but she didn't move her cheek out of my paw.  She was trembling.

"I'm scared Dean,"  she admitted softly.  "I'm so scared.  There is so much you need to know."

*

We had started the whole conversation in the kitchen.  Betrayal and anger had been her first reactions when we had all been in the same room.  Stoneware had flown, shattering against tile walls as she had screamed at the guys, laying bare what she had been told about us.  It made us out to be completely irreprehensible dicks because she was right to be upset.  We had hidden so much from her that we shouldn't have, and she was right that it had almost gotten her killed, and made us out to be utter jack asses.  Although to be fair, the bastard hadn't exactly painted a flattering picture of us to her.

That Biker Demon had sure as hell been planning on killing her when he'd had her though, as would any other Demon we ever came across.  Honestly?  I was still surprised she had been cut loose but Lucifer.  She was right to say that if she had been aware of our ties to the supernatural world, our history as hunters, she could have been better prepared to deal with something attacking her.  To begin with, she might not have been in such a vulnerable situation.

She might never have been taken at all if she'd only been aware of the possibilities.

Kenzie had been more than a little livid about the Supernatural books too, considering we had them all in the bunker.  It had blown up when she hit the truth surrounding both Cas and Chuck. Her anger towards Cas' betrayal, in particular, made her refuse to let him heal her injuries initially.  He'd kept on asking her to let him, and she'd kept on ignoring him outright. 

He'd admitted that he didn't have the grace to heal us both when she'd finally snapped that he'd have better luck offering it to me for my black eye.  He hadn't even suggested it to me, knowing I'd refuse, because her goddamned jaw was still completely broken.

It wasn't until she had stopped speaking to hold her hand to her jaw, in obvious pain, that she had allowed Cas to put hands on her.  That was only because Bobby had finally barked out that she was being pigheaded about letting him heal her, looking flustered and frustrated and upset.  I'd thought she was going to throw something at Bobby when she'd narrowed her eyes at him, but she'd just grit out a 'fine' in the end.

Cas hadn't hesitated, swiftly getting up from the dining table we were all clustered around defensively as she paced the tile floor.  His sober expression was somber and stony as he'd moved toward where she was had stopped in the middle of the floor.  They were watching each other as if they were complete strangers, and it kinda killed me.  All the levity was gone from Cas' countenance, and it was obvious he was well aware of how much he had damaged her trust.  She finally sighed after he stopped before her, apparently suddenly finding his bare toes interesting under the frayed hem of his worn jeans.

Her voice was quiet, almost defeated, "I'm still really mad at you, Cas."

"I know," his voice had been earnest and sincere, "I'm sorry I hurt you Kenzie."

Her lip barely quirked up at the corner, but the small smile was sad and wounded, "I know."

Slowly he'd reached out his hand, giving her time to change her mind again. When she didn't move he'd touched her, and then everything had suddenly gone to shit.

Both of them stiffened when his fingertips encountered her forehead, eyes wide like they were being electrocuted.  Cas had looked like someone kicked him in the nuts, even as Kenz had shrieked, both of them throwing themselves to the floor.  My blood had turned to instant ice.  They hit the ground hard, though I was already moving, Bobby and Chuck also leaping to their feet.

She was cowering on the tile floor, looking impossibly small.  Her fine boned hands were pressed so hard against her mouth her fingers were white as she was trying to muffle her hysterical sobbing.  Her alarmed gaze was locked on Cas, completely distraught.  She was shaking her head in denial between choked breaths even as tears dripped off her face and onto the floor.  From where he was sprawled Cas was looking at her with abject horror, and I was panicking as I fell to my knees amongst the turmoil.  I was hovering over her, not sure if I should touch her or not. Desperately, I was looking between the two of them even as I dropped my hands to her shoulders to try and pull her up.  My attempt had her jerking her body away from me, pushing further into the floor, making a sound like a wounded animal.

" **WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED?!** "  I demanded as I looked at the Angel.

"Oh my God."  Cas' voice sounded wrecked, but he ignored my question.  She made a choked sound at that, huddling there, her whole body shaking so hard I thought it was going to fall apart.

Suddenly Castiel was moving quickly to us, his eyes locked on her as he crab crawled in an ungainly manner.  Chuck and Bobby moved forward, but they weren't quick enough to grab him.  Instinctively I moved to put myself between them, but Cas shoved me with a strength I didn't know he could still possess, having eyes for nothing except for the cowering girl.

My Alpha had me on my feet the moment I registered what had happened, remembering Castiel's past sudden actions and how much they could _suck_.  Sometimes there was no telling how he would really react, and he had always been that way.

I was prepared to rip him off of my Omega and pound him into a bloody mess if he had hurt her.

Instead, I found him holding her as she was curled into an impossibly small ball in his arms in the middle of the floor.  Her face was buried in his chest as she sobbed brokenly as he rocked her like a child.  Cas had his mouth pressed firmly into the top of her head, kissing her locks for comfort.  His blue eyes were wet and wild, and I realized he was muttering quietly into her hair even as she kept on shaking her head, wailing something to him I couldn't make out other than denial.  He was looking right at me though through it all though, and his eyes said everything.

I wanted to kill something.

*

When she fled back to the safety of the bedroom, she left us in the kitchen unmoving in shock.  I stood there in the middle of the room like an asshole and just tried to calm down enough to be functional.  None of us said anything as we'd all shared a look.  Then Bobby grabbed a bottle of bourbon and we migrated into the library.

"So, Lucifer has a plan, and he shared it with Kenzie before he released her," Castiel informed us as he'd claimed a seat at the central table.

I stood behind the chair across from him, not listening to what he said, not fucking caring about anything other than what the fuck had hurt my Omega at that moment.  The Alpha inside me gave zero fucks about Lucifer other than wanting to kill him for hurting Kenzie in any way.  My hands were digging into the leather back of the chair as I glared at the Angel, physically shaking I was so angry.  Bobby sat next to the seat I had apparently claimed, Chuck already talking to Cas about what the hell that was supposed to mean about Lucifer releasing Kenzie.  I didn't care, although there was a part of me that distantly thought I should.  My Alpha needed to know what had made Kenzie react like that so I could kill it, although something told me I wasn't going to like the answer.

"What the hell happened back there Cas?" My voice was dangerous.

Around the Library table, I was aware that everyone was reacting to some degree or another to my question.  Bobby put a glass of amber liquid down in front of me, but I couldn't bring myself acknowledge it.  Pushing the chair out of my way, I stepped forward to the edge of the heavy oak and licked my lips, carefully resting my hands on the polished surface.  My looming got his attention, or it might have been the fact I wasn't even aware that I was growling like an animal until I saw that Chuck was physically shrinking back.  I couldn't help it, my Alpha and I were in complete agreement; if Lucifer had been in front of me right then, possessing Sam or not, I would have ripped out his fucking throat.  My vision was going white with fury.

"Cas,"  I said very carefully, "what the fuck just happened."

He looked more lost and dejected than I had ever seen him.  Not since he had first come to earth and learned God was ignoring had his face held that expression, but he didn't say anything.

I sent the table lamp flying with a crash.

" **GOD DAMN IT ANSWER ME!** "

"I... saw." He finally answered carefully,  "Everything.  Every moment that she was with Lucifer.  Everything he did to her, things... she never wanted anyone to know about."

I couldn't breathe; my pulse was in my ears as my Alpha raged.  My imagination was running over time.  Suddenly the leather chair was flying just to splinter against one of the support columns, the glass of bourbon Bobby had put in front of me sailed in the opposite direction to shatter against a wall.  My rage was directionless, desperate for any outlet because, in this, I was completely helpless.

"How bad?"  I finally growled over my shoulder when I had finally settled long enough to just stand there with my back to the table, my chest heaving.  I was aware that they were all waiting to see how much further my anger would carry me, deathly silent. "How bad was it Cas?  Tell me."

"He didn't physically actually hurt her, not... he... made her see things, some real, some not,"  Cas said dejectedly.  "Unfortunately, a large chunk of what she experienced did actually happen, just not to her.  Not technically, since it was only a re-created memory."

"What does that mean?"

"He gave her nightmares, and some of them..."

I turned and looked at him, and he was looking at me in a way I hadn't seen in... well... let's just say I never expected Castiel to look at me with that kind of regret or compassion again.

"What?" I demanded.

"She know's, unfortunately very extensively, what it means to be your victim in hell."

My mouth went dry.

"And that's not the worst," he continued, "Lucifer's final plan involves the victimization of your future child."

And just like that, the world was yanked out from under my feet again. 


	7. greasy fingers and low ceilings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenzie has a dream while Dean sleeps in the car.

I was sitting in a Pizzeria, a steaming, greasy delicious smelling slice of what looked to be real east coast cheese was sitting on a plate in front of me next to an innocent looking beer in a frosty glass.  The table was standard red topped and scuffed from years of use.  There was a napkin dispenser in the middle of the table next to a hand full of assorted condiments in various containers in various needs of refill, from crushed pepper flakes to parmesan cheese.  A small clouded white vase sat in the middle of the table with a couple of yellow carnations, like I had seen in a million different eateries.  The whole scene was surreally normal.

Only, there were no more pizzerias in the world.  The world had gone to shit, and things like pizza were no longer a thing.  This wasn't real, which meant I was asleep.

"You are quite right my dear, you are actually asleep."

I looked up to find a man, thin to the point of almost frail looking, with a large hooked nose and lanky dark hair, sitting across from me.  He was engaged in eating his own slice of pizza, making a face and letting out a little groan of pleasure as he started chewing his first bite.  When he opened his eyes he seemed to look through me, and his gaze was bone chilling.  He picked up a paper napkin and wiped his mouth.

"Do you know who I am?"  he asked.

"No,"  I answered quietly, unnerved, but weirdly unafraid.

His thin lips pulled into a small smile that seemed surprisingly genuine.  "You're very brave, considering what you've just been through.  Most people would be quaking in fear to be in a dream with someone like me, especially after all that nonsense with Lucifer."

My blood went a little cold at that, but I still didn't get the impression that the thin man meant me any harm.

"You aren't going to hurt me,"  I stated.

He continued to smile, "As I said, brave.  You don't even question it, you just know.  You're delightfully intuitive."

He picked up his pizza again, and even though I knew this was all a dream, I'll be damned if he didn't look like he was genuinely enjoying it.  His smile turned into a grin as I gave into temptation and picked up the slice in front of me, folding it so that I could eat it in the traditional fashion.  I gave a little groan of appreciation myself as the flavors burst across my tongue.  He continued to smile at me as he watched me enjoy my dream pizza, his fingers steepled in front of him, his own slice momentarily forgotten.  When I finished I accepted the napkin he handed me and wiped my mouth, waiting for him to cue me in as to what was going on.

"Did you enjoy your pizza?"  he asked as he sat back, studying me.

"Very much so, thank you."  He looked pleased with my polite response, nodding his head in approval.

"I'm glad.  It was very wonderful to learn you had such a delightful pallet.  I needed somewhere comfortable to meet you, and I have so missed this."  He motioned around us as he took a drink of his beer, encouraging me to do the same.  Nodded my head in subconscious agreement to his statement I took a sip of the Ale, not beer, I corrected myself; an old habit from school and a life long past.  That made him smile again as if he could read my mind.

"Do you know why I've brought you here?"  He asked as he picked up his slice and took a bite.  He watched me, waiting for an answer as he chewed, taking another sip of his Ale.

I simply shook my head and waited.

"I've brought you here because you are the Omega mate of Dean Winchester, brother of Sam Winchester, the current vessel of Lucifer."  He said.

I swallowed, a little nervously, and cleared my throat.  "Dean... hasn't claimed me yet."

The man scoffed with an eye roll.  "You cannot be serious.  If that man were any more attached to you, you'd be siamese twins.  You are his mate, make no mistake about that."

My pulse roared in my ears at that.  Dean hadn't ever even knotted me.  More than once now, I had lain in bed and wondered why.  He couldn't seem to keep his hands off me before, but he never knotted.  I had thought that maybe he thought it too intimate, the kind of thing only Mates did considering he wasn't the kind of Alpha to force himself on a girl.  I honestly wasn't going to be surprised if he sequestered himself over my heat.  Hurt, but not surprised.  Sure, we fucked like rabbits, but that didn't make me his mate, and I knew that.

The man looked slightly amused,  "Did you know, back when you first formed tribes, the right for an Alpha to claim an Omega was incredibly rare?  Omegas were sacred, almost holy to them back then.  When an Omega was in heat it was the task of every Alpha in the tribe to offer themselves to aide the Omega.  It was considered an honor to be chosen to assist with a heat.  For an Omega to consent to be claimed, it meant they had sensed something above average in an Alpha.  It was an incredibly celebrated thing, for an Omega to actually be able to find their Mate.  According to them, Alphas picked by Omegas grew to be great warriors, hunters, leaders, that kind of thing.  To force one's self upon an Omega meant a fate worse than death back then."

It rang familiar with my indigenous people's studies from school, but then again I had never really been a student of history.  "Well, things have apparently changed a bit."

The man's smile turned patronizing in a flash,  "It does amaze me how sometimes your kind can have all the pieces laid out before them and still not understand how they fit together.  But this is all beside the point, and not why I brought you here."

"I thought you brought me here because you consider me Dean's Mate."  I was confused.

He chuckled. "Yes, but I was about to go off on a tangent about ancient history and human biology."

Now I was even more confused.

He reached across the table to pat my hand, and I had to not shriek at his icy fingers.  They were cold as death.

"Do not concern yourself my dear, but yes, back on track.  You _are_  Dean Winchester's Mate, and I am interested in the fact that you want to stop Lucifer."

He went back to eating what was left of his food, and I gulped down my drink, no longer tasting or caring about it.  My hand almost ached from the cold of his touch, and I was fighting not to flex my fingers in discomfort.  There had been something primal and ancient that had caused the more primitive parts of my brain to shriek in terror when his fingers had made contact with my flesh.  It was a reaction I could not explain, for not even Lucifer had been able to instill that instinctive wariness in me.  This man now had my full and undivided attention.

"You wish to try and save his brother, Sam, however, do you not?  You have no intention of killing him if you can save him,"  he stated.

I swallowed and nodded.  The thought of Sam's death was the driving force behind Dean's refusal to say yes to Michael, even if he didn't realize that right away.  It was why he had never tried to find a way to hunt down the Devil because that would mean killing the man he had raised his entire life.  How could anyone ask someone to kill another they loved so much?

"I thought so."  he wiped his mouth again.  "If that is the case, then I will inform you that there are many methods to accomplish what you seek.  Some of them easier than others.  One, in particular, easier for someone like you."

"Someone like me?"

"A life-giver; an Omega.  The key to this particular lock is both complicated and simple, but the lock seals away Asherah.  You need simply need life hand in hand with death to be your key."

I frowned.  "That sounds ominous."

He laughed,  "It does, doesn't it?  But it truly isn't.  You simply need to go here,"  he pushed a Wyoming postcard across the table at me that appeared out of nowhere, a large rock formation that seemed out of the place on the landscape dominated the scene.  It was an obvious landmark of some kind, but one I didn't immediately recognize despite knowing I'd seen it somewhere before.

"And you need to be wearing this."  he held up his hand, where there was a white gold ring set with something bleached white, like a piece of bone or coral.

"What is Asherah?"

"Who is more correct."

Hmming I studied the postcard for a moment, but there was nothing else on it, no writing on the back or anything.  Just that picture.  I looked up, and looking pointedly at his ring, I asked,  "And how do I get that ring?"

"That's the conundrum, isn't it?  How does one living receive a boon from Death?"  He asked me that over steepled fingers as he sat back in his chair.

My pulse thundered in my ears as I tried to control my breathing, a true primal terror taking root in me as I came to realize just who, _exactly_ , was sitting across from me.

"Why are you telling me this?"  I finally asked after a small eternity of silence.

"Becuase that spoiled brat has been making me raise souls from the dead."

The twist of rage on Death's features and the accompanying snarl in his voice made me jump as he all but spat out the sentence.  Realizing he had lost his composure he closed his eyes for a moment, drawing a deep breath as I sat, perfectly still, watching _Death_  reign in his temper.  When he looked at me again, he really looked at me, and I wished with everything I had that he would go back to looking through me.

"I harbor all of the gifts that life has given me as the most cherished things to ever exist.  Life chose to share these things with me, and no one else.  To have them defiled in such a way..."  his gaze hardened, and I held my breath.

"I miss life,"  he finally said,  "there is no more life in this world that Lucifer has destroyed."

*

I woke up with a gasp, my heart thundering in my ears as I stared at the dark ceiling.  It took me a moment to get my bearings, the smell from the pizzeria still lingering in my nose as I registered that I was tangled in the blankets in the middle of my bed.  A bed that was cold and conspicuously empty but still smelled like him.

My Alpha.

It was weird to admit it to myself, even in my own head.  I had been avoiding the absolute truth of that fact with every conscious effort, but the reality was there.  Dean Winchester was my Alpha.  He'd been my Alpha since the trailer.  It didn't matter if he'd marked me or not, over the last few months my Omega had completely imprinted on him in every way.  My world couldn't endure without Dean Winchester in it anymore, I couldn't imagine an existence without him.

Getting out of bed and moving across the room I opened the door to be met with the heavy atmosphere that only exists in the weird hours between about one to three in the morning.  The bunker was as silent as a tomb, telling me that everyone had turned in.  It was as if the whole world is trying to breathe as quietly as it can for fear of disturbing something's rest.  On bare feet I moved quietly down the hall, looking for Dean.

I found Castiel.

He was sitting silently in the library, only given away from the flick of his lighter as he lit up his pipe.  He sucked down the pungent contents before he silently offered the glass and lighter to me.

Fuck it, why not?

I moved forward and took both the items, not actually needing the lighter when I gave an experimental pull on the pipe.  Using the already glowing cherry I took a small hit before passing it back, trying not to let a little cough that tried to catch take hold as I exhaled.  He took the items back, watching me with those sad eyes of his before he spoke.

"I'm so sorry Kenzie."  He said quietly.

I couldn't help my flinch, knowing exactly what he was referring to.  When Cas had touched me everything that had happened had gone flying through my mind, and I had simply known that he had become suddenly aware of exactly what I had been through.  I really hadn't wanted anyone, ever, to know some of that stuff.

"It wasn't your fault Cas,"  I gave him a small smile because it truly wasn't.

He continued to look up at me with that earnest puppy dogs expression as the haziness of the marijuana started to hit me.  I reached out and cupped his stubbly cheek in my hand, looking him dead in the eye.

"You didn't do anything wrong Cas, it was just... a little too much, so suddenly.  All of it's been so hard to process, to filter through.  It's not your fault."

"I can,"  he spoke haltingly,  "make it better.  Take the edge off, you might say.  You won't forget, but it won't be so... raw."

I found myself nodding.

  
***

  
My head slammed into the roof of the Impala when the car door opened, jerking me awake.  The crack of the contact was unbearably loud in the stillness of the garage, and I brought my hands up to my head as I hissed out a few choice words from the pain.  My lap was then suddenly full of a small squirming body, distracting me from my throbbing skull as my Omega was suddenly crowding into me, distracting me from the pain.

Kenzie made small, distressed, sounds from where she was suddenly straddling my hips, her small hands pushing mine out of the way as I clutched at my injured dome.  She probed my scalp with gentle fingers, trying to seek out just where I had made contact to see if any serious harm had been done.  I didn't dare move as she laid gentle kisses all over my hair, apparently satisfied that I hadn't suffered something life-threatening.  She was making soothing little noises in her throat, her whole demeanor tender and warm.  The whole situation seemed surreal, and my brain flashed back to a long forgotten memory of my mother pressing kisses all over a banged elbow.  Her kisses and been just as soft and her eyes just gentle while she had offered me comfort.

"Are you ok?"  Kenzie's face was furrowed with concern as she pulled back, her eyes darting from my face to my hair and back.

"I'm fine,"  I finally got out, not wanting to move because I was terrified she was going to vanish because this had to be a dream.

She settled back, and for a moment we just didn't move in the dark silence and just stared at each other.  Dark hair tumbled around her shoulders in that casually messy way that made me want to bury my hands on it to see if I could possibly muss it up more.  The angles of her pretty face were soft in the shadows, and it was a little hard to read her expression due to the lack of light, but her eyes were bright and piercing.  With such a slight body it almost didn't even register that she was resting her weight on me, but my Alpha was well aware of every single point of contact her body was making with mine.

"Dean,"  she broke the silence, and my heart tripped in my chest even as I held my breath.  "why are you sleeping in the car?"

The air hissed out of me.  I was not quite sure how to appropriately answer that question because there were a lot of things I could say.  Did I want to tell her that I didn't deserve to ever touch her again, especially now that she knew how fucked up I really was?  Did I want to tell her that I might be more dangerous to be around than being on her own out in this world?  Could I touch her knowing that her body had experienced what it was like to receive violence from the very mitts that would be all over her skin?  She didn't let me off the hook though, instead, she just sat there on top of me, waiting for my answer.

"I... thought you would want the space."  I finally said.

She let out a little huff of air and shook her head.  Without a drop of hesitation, she leaned forward and pressed a kiss to my mouth.

"Well, you were wrong."  her warm breath ghosted over my mouth as she spoke, lips brushing mine.

The smell of her, no trace of fear or terror, washed over me as I felt her press another gentle kiss to my lips.  This time I chased her mouth when she went to pull back and was rewarded with a little groan and a renewal of pressure.  Hesitantly I brought a hand up to touch her back.  When she bent submissively to the gentle pressure of my palm, her chest molding to mine, part of my control snapped.

My hand was suddenly buried in her hair holding her head immobile.  I plundered that hot cavern like a thirsty man finally getting water; my tongue sliding against hers as I tried to taste every inch of her mouth.  Her ass flexed under my fingertips as I pressed her firmly into my hips, my pelvis doing a slow roll beneath her.  The feeling of me, hard and ready, caused her to gasp against my mouth, and I drank it down like the finest of wines.

Fuck me, this Omega was going to be the death of me.

I broke the kiss for air, my head thumping back against the car seat.  Looking up at the feral thing who was chewing on her lower lip, looking as ripe and appealing as a fresh peach, I was unsure what to do next.  My Alpha knew what it wanted.  It wanted to take the sweet smelling thing in my lap and make her forget her own name in the back seat.  Guilt and shame kept me from simply doing just that.

She seemed to sense it because suddenly she was pulling back to sit up straight.  Kenzie looked at me, still and unblinking for a moment, and it was like she was reading my mind.  I rubbed my hands up and down her legging coated thighs, reveling in the warmth of her flesh seeping through.  Just because I didn't deserve to touch her anymore didn't mean I wasn't going to try and take some advantage of it while I could.

Not saying another word she turned and climbed off of me, leaving the car door open behind her as she walked off.  The mental berating started the moment she reached for the door latch.  I didn't even try to stop her.  Laying there staring at the ceiling of the car, I knew I had just blown it, although I wasn't quite sure how.

I abruptly realized I hadn't heard the door to the bunker close behind her when she spoke, causing me to sit up suddenly and wang my head again.  Swearing as I clutched at my aching scalp, her words only then really registering with me.

"Are you coming to bed?"


	8. QUICK UPDATE!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quick note!

So, if you are reading this, first of all, THANK YOU.

I have no idea how you made it past that intro, much less all the way here, but you have no idea how much I appreciate it.

I love this story. This thing has made me lose sleep, made me cry and laugh, and has made me want to throw my computer on more than one occasion. It is NOT abandoned by any stretch of the imagination.

That being said, I started working on this when pain and injury were keeping me from being able to sleep or pretty much function as a human being, and it really shows in some places. So this whole thing is getting a very serious edit and partial re-write. I will update this post as I update chapters, and then when all is done the story shall continue on to completion. There's a decent amount more to cover, but the rough edges really need to be smoothed out so that this story stops making me want to rip out my hair when I go back and re-read it.

A new chapter 3 has just been added, previous chapter 3 is now chapter 4 and is in the midst of a re-write as well. 

Thank you for your patience, and thank you so much for making it this far. You guys are awesome.


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